Science says: not putting your relationship on social media is actually good

Everyone knows them or has them on their friends list: those couples who constantly post photos of each other. Posting stories about each other. About. Every. Thing. Going to the bakery together? Storytime. Having a couch night together? That has to go on Instagram, of course. And when these couples go on vacation... Well, you can't escape that. Every day (or every other day) photos. Every tourist spot gets captured with a loving photo and, if possible, a cliché caption underneath.

And then you think: those two really have a great relationship. It can't be otherwise. Why else would you post everything on Instagram? You really don't do that if you're not that happy. Well... According to science, it's a bit different. They say that showing off your relationship comes from insecurity. A certain need for validation that makes you want to show the world that you really are having a great time together. And the confirmation, the likes from your followers, is very important.

But well, we all feel insecure sometimes. But now it turns out that shielding your relationship from social media is actually better. The Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin published a study that clearly showed that the happiest couples are the quietest couples on social media.

Then you come back to that confirmation: people who are not looking for it have less urge to share everything. They know that everything is fine. It actually sounds so logical, but still, you sometimes see so many photos of a couple on social media that you think: can it be a little less? And it doesn't always come across as very sincere. Exceptions aside, of course, because there are always some.

By the way, I notice these things because I am scrolling aimlessly on Instagram quite a bit (well, just too much). It turns out that people who hardly use social media are much happier than the heavy users. Bummer.