Why you should stop positive thinking according to psychologists

Not every day is filled with glitter and rainbows, and you might as well come to terms with that. Because searching for happiness everywhere is not good for you, it turns out.

According to psychologists, you should stop that constant positive thinking. Millions of self-help books are sold worldwide every day, but honestly? It doesn't have to be. Sometimes let it all be nice and stupid, miserable, dramatic, annoying, rotten, unpleasant, and fucking frustrating. Acknowledging that and giving in to your negative emotions is better than always wanting to cover it up and ignore it. Learn to think realistically: sometimes something is too crazy, sometimes something is disappointing. For everyone, no matter how beautiful the picture on someone's Instagram is. According to researchers, it is the realists who ultimately are the happiest in life.

Pay attention, because here's the thing. You can learn it. ‘Those who overestimate how well something will turn out or underestimate it are less happy than the realists, who sit somewhere in the middle with their expectations.’ In short, don't think that something will be terribly disappointing. Also, don't think that something you do will be incredibly easy and full of kittens and cupcakes. Sit in the middle: it's not terrible, it's not great. If you set yourself up like this in life, then you will ultimately be the happiest in your shoes. Too much positive thinking is therefore not a good plan. Because if you think too positively about everything, things can also disappoint you faster. And then a feeling of disappointment prevails again.

And being too negative about everything is also not good for you: then you think too gloomily. If you are realistically oriented, you are not pessimistic beforehand and not sad afterward: you shrug your shoulders and move on. You are not worrying and sulking so much. You accept things as they are and you live your life with your head held high. But you also don't expect only beautiful sunny days, and that keeps you strong.

So, experts say: stop positive thinking. Also stop negative thinking. If you doubt, think: is it realistic that I think this way? If so, if you have reasons for your feelings, then it's okay. But don't drive yourself crazy with thoughts that are too negative or too positive.