Yes: it is time for a new music video review by Donny Roelvink

You can't get around it, even if you wanted to. DonDon has started a music career and is throwing one hit after another at us. After the success of ‘Blokkeren’, I actually shouldn't say anything more about his new clips. But there were questions. Too many questions. So it was time for an old-fashioned music video review. Buckle up, here we go.

Donny Roelvink X Debiasi – ALLANG (prod. Lopex)

You knew all along, all along, all along
That I'm here for you now
All along, all along, all along
Tell me how you don't trust...

Good, seen it? Nice. Then we can now have an opinion. Before you make the same mistake I did, the guy on the left with the little beard is NOT Jossylvio. That's DonDon. Just to avoid confusion, that would be a shame. We're zooming in on a couple of cool Nike kicks, a bright red Mustang, and we see a girl in a yellow crop top doing the splits on roller skates – respect for this pose.

Alright, on to DonDon. Next to him is Debiasi, and Debiasi apparently has done something that makes his girlfriend not trust him. I wouldn't either because the guy gives me a rather confused impression. Take his first line from the first verse.

‘I'm not even here late, but if I want you, I'm here late.’

What's it going to be, Debiasi? Are we going to be here late or not? Do you have other plans? What's it going to be? Self-love is important, you know. I wouldn't just let a girl decide whether you're here late or not.

Let's continue. Debiasi is on fire with his lyrics.

‘I have you here, right? And I'm here, right? I have you here, right? And I'm here, right?’

I wonder if I'm missing a deeper message in this story. Maybe I'm missing a secret message. Maybe this is code language and I'm ‘not there yet’. Because he's vague, right? And I find it vague, right? So I'm still complaining.

00:46 minutes. In the meantime, Debiasi has sung a whole lot about who is where exactly, everything his chick should have known ‘all along, all along, all along’ but we haven't heard anything from Don yet. The question is when he will musically take over. And especially: with what words. 00:47 OH WAIT DON IS GOING TO SING!

‘And you know I'm here, right?

Why do you have such an ego?’

Oh shit. Don is also angry. But he still gives us a little tongue in the camera and flexes his arm muscles just in case we had forgotten that he's a fitboy. Don, no worries. We would never forget that. The Mustang continues to be used as a background prop. The American red cups, the chains, and the sunglasses with colored lenses also make their entrance at the party. And then...

....there's dancing....
Some moves look painful, Don.
You know I'm always honest with you.

Some lines sound so distorted by the autotune that I can't quite understand them anymore. I'm pretending I didn't see that Hooligan candle you're holding with the colored smoke coming out.

Where are we actually? Noordwijk?
The party looks medium lit.

1 minute 5. HOW MANY HIP BAGS DO WE HAVE IN THIS SHOT? I'm just really confused. Damn, I just threw mine away because I thought it couldn't be used anymore. Boys, you have so many, can I borrow one of yours? Come on? By the way, are you renting surfboards now? Surf school Castricum the place to be?

The girls' butts have been checked, the sun is setting, and the party -still with the red Mustang- continues at sunset. DonDon is still intrigued by the Hooligan sticks with smoke coming out. To emphasize his enthusiasm, he does a few backflips and flashy dance moves across the field.

That it feels a bit like I'm watching my little brother who has used laughing gas with his friends and is ‘loesoe’ on a field with his bros, I only tell you in confidence, Don. Because you know: I'm always honest.

And then came the final shot. All music video makers know: with that shot you can impress. Then you give us just a little something to make an indelible impression. Something we haven't seen yet. Which is quite difficult when you've made your music video in two hours, but I have high hopes because Mister Roelvink has the honor to keep it high after Blokkeren. DonDon looks into the camera and then...

...we see him again with the stick from which smoke comes out...

Oh. Anticlimax indeed. Wow.

Look, in my mother's time there was a man, (first black, but slowly he became white, it was just like a Google trick) and that man's name was Michael Jackson. This Michael invested millions in music videos like Thriller, for which you would almost want to buy a cinema ticket if that were necessary.

But we millennials have DonDon. Who manages to shoot a gem of a clip in two hours of filming in Castricum that we will talk about for years.

Dear Don. You know: I'm a fan from the very beginning.

Hats off. You've done it again.

If this doesn't become a summer hit, I don't know anymore.

Because I knew all along, all along, all along....

Whoever wants to reach the top must go to the bottom.

DonDon. You are my star.

Forever yours.

P.S.: When are you going to call me to feature in your clip, boy?! I know I still need to work on that J-Lo look, but I'm on my way. Give me a few more weeks.