5 x tips for ending a relationship
Yesterday I wrote about the ways to end a relationship, which will definitely not be appreciated. Therefore, I thought it would be a good idea to also share how you can approach this better. With these tips, it won't suddenly become a lot less sad, but it might make the break-up a bit more bearable. After all, you want to hurt the other person as little as possible.
1. Be direct and clear
You will hurt someone's ego anyway when you end the relationship. So don't make it a long-winded story, but be clear and keep it ‘short’. This is of course easier said than done, but someone doesn't benefit from a long list of reasons why it wouldn't work. Name the main reason and be honest and clear about it.
2. Don't blame the other person
Don't shift the ’blame’ of the break onto the other person. It's already painful enough for someone, so don't add to it by saying it's because of something they did (unless it involves cheating, of course, then you can say something about it). Instead, you should try to make it clear that your two characters just don't match, because no one is to blame for that.
3. Don't create expectations
In the short term, it might soften the pain to leave the door ajar, but it's better to rip off the band-aid all at once. Giving the other person hope will only lead to more misery, and you'll end up hurting them twice as hard. If you deep down feel that there is no future, then you need to be open and honest about it.
4. Treat someone with respect
This may sound obvious, but it isn't. It's actually very simple: treat the other person as you would like to be treated. Would you like to be dumped via a text message? No, of course not. Treat the other person carefully and respectfully, so that no bad words can be said about you afterwards. Who knows, a beautiful friendship might still come out of ending it nicely.
5. Choose the right place and time
Okay, there is rarely a good moment, but there are certainly times when it's better to wait. If you really want to consider the other person, then for example, don't do it on a Monday with a busy week ahead. I understand that breaking up is not exactly a usual agenda item, but try to do it just before a quiet period, so your soon-to-be ex can recover without double stress. Naturally, you shouldn't break up in a busy place with other people, as that forces the other person to suppress their emotions, and that's a very bad idea. A quiet place where you won't be disturbed is a must.
