People say: ‘this is the dumbest excuse for cheating’

My hope for monogamous relationships has nearly hit rock bottom over the years, as I honestly see hardly any relationships where both partners are faithful. Is that impossible nowadays? And in almost a hundred percent of those cases, it's not just once, but rather towards countless times. So I'm always curious how those people get caught, and what they then say. Especially when someone is caught red-handed and has only a few milliseconds to come up with something. Because if you're already cheating and not being honest with your partner, the chance is pretty small that you'll suddenly be honest afterwards.

But it can always be worse, as Reddit shows again. Here the question was asked: ‘What is the dumbest explanation you’ve heard from someone who cheated?’ and the answers are… Well, read it for yourself.

1. ‘I invited you to join us, it’s not my fault you said ‘no’.’

2. ‘I wanted to try something new.‘
…He cheated on me with his ex.’

3. ‘But you deleted your Facebook, and my friends and I found you very suspicious then.‘
I don’t even know where to start with this logic.’

4. ‘It was just one time‘ is always a good one.’

5. ‘His brother was going through a tough divorce and that made him very sad, so he cheated.’

6. ‘She is so hot and flirty that I just know she will eventually cheat on me. So I thought I’d get ahead of it so at least we’ve had that.’

7. ‘I didn’t want to hurt you.‘ Well, mission failed.’

8. ‘It wasn’t my intention.’

9. ‘It’s not what it looks like,‘ while I caught my girlfriend with another. In bed.’

10. ‘I’m really having a tough time with my family right now.‘ Loser.’

11. ‘I was bored.’

12. ‘My grandma passed away.‘ I didn’t realize that cheating on your girlfriend is a standard method of mourning.’

13. ‘I just need sex, it’s not a choice.’

14. ‘It’s not cheating, I used a condom.’

15. ‘I didn’t think our relationship was that serious yet.’