Science says: these three types of love we have in our lives
When you think back to your first love, you might not even be able to imagine that you were ever together. Not because they are a terrible person, but simply because you now fall for a completely different type. And that makes perfect sense, because according to Elephant Journal, we have three types of love, or three types of relationships, in our entire lives. We need each type of love for a different reason.
1. The ideal love
This love is our first great love. It is a fairy-tale relationship that seems almost too good to be true. You envision a future together and are almost certain that this is unconditional love. You could say that this love is somewhat childish and naive, as you have no other comparison material. Often, this dream ultimately shatters when you both grow older and develop as individuals. The chances are high that you will grow apart and find out that you are not entirely made for each other.
2. The tough love
The second love is our most difficult love. We think we have made a better choice with this relationship compared to our previous love, but we are still making choices out of the need to learn. This love is accompanied by a lot of drama and pain. Deep lows and high peaks make this love incredibly addictive and toxic. The attempt to make it work becomes more important than whether it should work at all. Therefore, this love leads to an unsafe on-and-off relationship. Ultimately, it is a hard life lesson and we mainly learn what we do not want in the future. It often takes a while to break free from it, but once you have finally stepped away completely, you never want to go back.
3. The true love
Lastly, there is true love: the love we never see coming because this person absolutely did not fit our ideal image. For this love, you let go of all ideals because it feels good and it works. You are almost surprised at how easy it is with this love. You do not have to pretend to be someone else because this person sees you and fully accepts who you are. There is an intimate connection that feels nice and safe. Of course, it always requires work and you will have some serious arguments from time to time, but deep down you feel that it is right and that you will stay together for a long time.
Not everyone has these three types of love, of course. Sometimes it happens right away and you find the ideal love first. Well, that saves you a lot of trouble.
