#FML: ‘My friend had a secret family’

‘I was sold the moment I met Tom. I was 22 and until then I had only had short-lived relationships with childish types. Tom was different. We met at a festival and I remember that from the first moment I couldn't take my eyes off him. Something about him was so incredibly attractive that I didn't care that he was over ten years older.

I didn't notice much of that age difference during our relationship, by the way. Except that I was still studying and had a lot of free time, and he was very busy with his work. He was often abroad and was really unreachable, but when we saw each other again it was amazing. He took me on weekend trips to beautiful cities in Europe and sometimes we would spend whole days in bed at my place. I didn't mind that we were never at his place; he indicated that he felt best with me and I chose to believe that.

We had eight wonderful months together until one day I received a call from an unknown number. I hesitantly answered and to my surprise, I heard a female voice on the other end of the line. It was Tom's wife. His. Wife. She told me that she had had a gut feeling for a while that something was wrong, so she decided to look in his phone and computer. There she discovered countless messages between Tom and me. It quickly became clear to me that he not only had a wife but also children. He had a whole family. Every time he was with me, he lied to his family and told them he had to go abroad for work, the same lies he told me when he pretended to be a devoted husband and father.

I couldn't believe my ears. My heart was pounding in my throat and I felt a mix of anger, sadness, and humiliation. The idea that I had been part of his deception was unbearable. Eventually, I confronted Tom with everything I knew. He burst into tears and begged for forgiveness. He promised me that he really intended to leave his wife so that we could move forward together. But when I asked him how he planned to introduce me to his children, he had no answer. It was clear that he had never really thought about the consequences of his lies. Furious and disappointed, I put him out on the street. I had no desire to hear his excuses or promises of a better future. How could he have thought he could get away with something like this?

In the weeks that followed, Tom's wife called me several times pleading for all the details. She wanted to understand what had happened and how long this deception had lasted. I chose to ignore her calls. If she wanted to know something, she should ask the star of the show. Tom, in turn, didn't leave me alone and bombarded me for weeks with flowers and cards to apologize. Of course, I had no interest in that, and fortunately, he eventually stopped. I have no idea how they are doing now. I hope somewhere that they have managed to patch up their family, but I also think his wife deserves much better.’