Just about Special Forces VIPS

The. Very. Last. I don't know about you, dear Special Forces VIPS fans, but I can't anymore. And that with a measly 124 steps on my pedometer. Don't judge, for me it's just a Sunday. I secretly hope that the staff men will finally manage to get me off my couch this last time with motivational quotes like ‘who dares wins’ or ‘fear is go’, but let's be honest: has this ever really worked with the most unathletic writer in the country? Today is your last chance, guys, do your best now. In the meantime, are you watching episode 8?

1. Oh yes, they were still stress swimming. And because of that, I'm stress couch hanging. Hello panic attack! That didn't last long.

2. Erik probably had no issues rehearsing his lines for the finale. His only lines from episode 8 are: ‘Back, back, BACK!’ and that about 236 times.

3. Phew, is Lotte being sent home last minute? That's a bit silly. A bit like being invited to a children's party and then not being allowed to come at the last moment. Well Lot, you can come to my party!

4. Erik and I seem to be more alike than I thought. His ‘just look around you, because you won't come back here’ was exactly my line when my ex unexpectedly dumped me a few years ago.

5. Okay, I might be a bit late with this, but I've come up with a new drinking game. With every: ‘to make it even harder...’ you take a shot. Extreme tipsiness guaranteed.

6. ‘Number 13, I think you're a bit off balance!’ Gosh Mitchel, do you think? In the ice-cold water with currents, weights on your body and slippery stones where you slip every 30 centimeters? I almost fall off my couch just watching it. Stop it now.

7. I have an important announcement: I am very anti loose, unstable ladders on bridges. The reason seems clear to me.

8. ‘The recruits have overcome all setbacks and challenges so far,’ I always imagine the voice-over of my life saying when I've survived a busy weekend without a mental breakdown (I actually high-fived about this yesterday).

9. Um, excuse me? WHY DO THEY HAVE TO SLEEP UNDERGROUND AGAIN?! Madness, this. Ab-so-lute madness.

10. Digging your own grave (uh sorry, sleeping place) apparently ensures that finally all secrets are shared. I generally need about two and a half cocktails for that, but this is also a way, I guess.
Oh yes, see, now the tears are coming. I usually need about four and a half cocktails for this.

11. No, but seriously, I understand Jorien. It really does feel like you're digging a grave, and how intense is that after such a week AND after losing so many people? Not nice of the staff. They can't come to my party.

12. Thijs is the absolute biggest, sweetest darling that exists. Thijs, if I ever get lost in a forest with only a shovel and a headlamp with my name on it (this will never happen, I can absolutely guarantee you that), will you come with me?

13. Of course, also a water crossing in the middle of the night. Why? Can everyone who does this for fun raise their hands? And could you please get checked out right away.

14. Goodness, they really pulled it off, those two, and of course I'm crying again. Thijs and G.I. Jorien: CHA-PEAU. I know I like to criticize this show, but I find this so incredibly impressive. All the other candidates are also really fighters of the highest caliber, I could never.

15. I'm glad Erik got a bit more text at the end of the episode, this must be so valuable for them. I almost want to sign up for the next season, just to receive a proud speech from Erik (whoa, take it easy: I said almost).

Wait a minute, this is NOT the last episode? Are we just being rewarded with a real reunion next week? This is the best day ever. Thanks to my mini celebration dance, my pedometer is now at 136, so you could say the staff has managed to get me off the couch for a bit. That's really a huge achievement, just ask my boyfriend. Anyway, you guys are not rid of me yet. I'll see you next week for (really now) the very last Special Forces VIPS!

Image: SHOTBYSUD