Lifestyle

Kiki's Spain Writings: ‘Madre mía, bureaucracy is a b*tch’

By Kiki Duren | #!31Mon, 23 Oct 2023 10:58:09 +0200+02:000931#31Mon, 23 Oct 2023 10:58:09 +0200+02:00-10Europe\/Amsterdam3131Europe\/Amsterdam202331 23am31am-31Mon, 23 Oct 2023 10:58:09 +0200+02:0010Europe\/Amsterdam3131Europe\/Amsterdam2023312023Mon, 23 Oct 2023 10:58:09 +020058105810amMonday=9#!31Mon, 23 Oct 2023 10:58:09 +0200+02:00Europe\/Amsterdam10#10-23-2023#!31Mon, 23 Oct 2023 10:58:09 +0200+02:000931#\/31Mon, 23 Oct 2023 10:58:09 +0200+02:00-10Europe\/Amsterdam3131Europe\/Amsterdam202331#!31Mon, 23 Oct 2023 10:58:09 +0200+02:00Europe\/Amsterdam10#

Hello beautiful! Welcome to a new episode of ‘Kiki experiences a lot of bureaucratic adventures in Spain’. You see: in the first weeks of an emigration, practical things need to be arranged. It's not my favorite, but I can't avoid it at this stage either.

So too: applying for residency. If you stay in Spain for more than three months, you are legally required to become a resident. And no, that’s not something you can just arrange in a jiffy. In fact, there are many lawyers and suspended ones who have made a business model out of helping freshly emigrated fish like us with applying for documents in Spain. It takes a long time. A really long time. The paperwork is hefty and you can’t count on Spaniards speaking English just like that. Spaniards are proud of their culture. And rightly so.

Anyway, applying for residency is a process that you usually start when you arrive here, and it can take several months right away. You simply need to either have a stable income (I’m an entrepreneur so they already find me exciting, haha) or you must be able to prove that you can support yourself in Spain and that you’re not just coming here to take advantage. Simply put: if you have money, everything is possible.

Don’t have a stable income? Then you need to have at least 10,000 euros per person in a Spanish bank account for a minimum of three months to obtain residency. The first step is therefore: opening a Spanish bank account, to then transfer that 20K. Thank god we were able to sell our house with equity.

Through a Dutch law firm, we hear that the Spanish ING has a ‘cuenta, no cuenta’ policy. Which means: they cannot fine you if the account remains empty. Something that is not the case with all Spanish banks; if you’re unlucky, you might open an account where they charge you a 60 euro fine per month (!) if no money comes in monthly. Quite remarkable.

We had already tried a few things online via ING, but that was horror (and everything in Spanish) and when I called the office, no one could speak English, so sometimes going in person is the best option. So off we went with our good behavior, randomly to the center of Alicante.

We arrive at the ING in the center and there’s a GIGARIE OUTSIDE. Right. Six Flags has nothing on this. This is going to take a while. What is it with foreign banks and these giant queues? Do we have it all so perfectly arranged in the Netherlands? In any case, we do more online. Here you have to come in person for everything.

We hesitate for a moment to join the line and then see from the opening hours that we… are definitely too late because the bank is closed in the afternoon (something with siesta) and that will be the case in half an hour. Wrong timing. Behold once again a day in the life of Kiek & San, who were trying to arrange something but ultimately returned empty-handed. Welcome to Spain, chicos!

PS. Next week part 2, because we didn’t stop here, you understand.