Just about my rarely terrible addiction

And a desperate call to Ziggo

‘May, do you know that the fifth season of The Affair is available on Ziggo?’ Daniëlle asks me because she knows I was just as addicted to The Affair as she was. I didn't watch The Affair, I devoured it. Did I need to chop vegetables for dinner? Then the laptop was in front of me. Did I have to wait five minutes until my daughters had unsaddled the ponies on Wednesday afternoon? Then I dove into the world of Noah and Helen. And the rest.

I was almost relieved when it was over. I had peace again.

But there it was again, the temptation. That season had apparently been on the shelves since 2019, our Wieke had of course written about it long ago, but I only discovered it now and the damage had to be made up. I did that. With flair, if I may say so. Visitors out the door, hats on the couch and to Ziggo Plus. My love working through the evening. I hung up the streamers because The Affair had rolled out the carpet for me. When I wasn't watching, I talked about it and I discovered many other The Affair addicts.

But then it happened. Just last Thursday. I was ready. Really ready. Cup of peppermint tea on the left, glass of wine on the right (it was a party and almost the weekend), so I pressed the middle button on my remote that would smoothly lead me to the holy of holies. I had left off at (SPOILER ALERT) Noah hiding with his demented ex-father-in-law behind a Kanye-esque flower hedge that Sasha Mann, the actor who plays Noah in the adaptation of his book and who is now having an affair with Helen, Noah's ex - yes, yes, it's a lot - and is not welcome at his daughter Whitney's wedding. Almost at the junction of all the storylines. And what happened? The Affair was nowhere to be found. Poof, gone. Not even during a month change, without any prior notice from Ziggo that this series would soon disappear. Just completely gone. Without aftercare either.

So I press the search button and type in ‘The A’ and think: here it comes, I just had to take a detour, but no. What appeared? Care Bears and The A-list New York.

No Noah, zero Helen. Completely zero at Ziggo. I searched every other pay channel, but The Affair is nowhere to be found and visible in the Netherlands. In desperation, I ordered the entire series (five seasons) on DVD. For a measly eighty euros. It will arrive in one to two weeks. Until then, I lie in bed with foam in the corners of my mouth waiting.

I would like to request Ziggo: put that series back online. Even if it's just for one evening. I’ll be quick.

And to you all:

Is there by any chance an AA for Affair Addicts nearby?