Thank God It's Almost Christmas: Daphne Deckers
In 29 days, at the time of writing, we will silence the phone, set up the food infusion, and take a moment to reflect on what we are satisfied with and proud of. Christmas, in short. To get into the mood, I ask some of my favorites in the field about my favorite holiday. Today, I place under the mistletoe: Daphne Deckers.
Daphne, I just guess that someone like you, who loves the homely, is a real Christmas fan. Richard, Alec, and Emma under one roof again and having time for board games and books. Is that right?
“I am really a Christmas lover. I have been the Decoration Chef at home for years. Richard once said: ‘You’d be better off between a hippopotamus and the water than between Daphne and the Christmas tree,’ haha… When the new Vondels Christmas bauble collection goes online in September, I immediately start browsing: what’s new, what do I like, what don’t I have yet? If you wait until Sinterklaas, the best baubles are already gone – probably because there are many more of those early enthusiasts like me.”
No bitterball balls
“I have to be honest that I have become a bit tired of all those weird balls, from fries with mayo to herring with onions… I have had many crazy balls in my tree for years, but now that you can also hang in breasts and bitterballen, I notice that I am slowly going back to more classic Christmas ornaments.”
“Mom, just sit down!”
“I definitely don’t have peace at Christmas, haha… I do love it when everyone is home, so the kids with their partners. But with six people, there is always something that needs to go in the oven or the table needs to be turned from lunch to dinner. The kids always say: ‘Mom, just sit down!’, but I just find it cozy to be busy with Christmas branches, candles, nice napkins, and other fuss. I can’t cook very well, but I can decorate. My son Alec is the meat king in our house: he goes all out with special meat, sous vide, temperatures, and what does he all do. Emma, on the other hand, is a vegetarian, so she makes delicious vegetable stews. My daughter-in-law Michelle makes a great sticky chicken. And Richard is in charge of logistics: he drags the chairs, the grill, and the gourmet set.”
What does Christmas look like in the Deckers-Krajicek household?
“We start with a lot of games. Code Names is currently our favorite, but we also like to play Pictionary, 30 Seconds, Beverbende, Vampire Hunt, Cluedo, and of course the good old: Jenga! Richard, Emma and Alec are all strategic thinkers, and I am totally not, so I rarely win at games. Even with word games like Scrabble, Richard wipes the floor with me because I am only focused on “laying beautiful words” while Richard mainly pays attention to double word scores and colors.
By the way, I do win at Pictionary because I can draw something quickly and simply. At my mother’s house, we like to play Yahtzee during the holidays around a pot of tomato soup, grandma’s roasted chicken, and homemade applesauce. My mother throws Yahtzee way too often; no idea how that could be statistically possible, haha!”
And does that somewhat match your ideal Christmas?
“Yes, actually it does. I have also been at Christmas a tropical island but that’s not quite it, a Christmas tree on the beach. I much prefer the Austrian atmosphere, with snow and cheese fondue. Quite strange actually, our Western obsession with a snowy Christmas; I don’t believe Jesus ever saw snow in Palestine. In Spain, the nativity scenes look very different: they look like they are in the Middle East, with camels, a water well, and much more of the Biblical atmosphere.
I am not religious myself; I believe in people. If I have everyone around me that I love and if everyone is doing well, my Christmas atmosphere is already top. We certainly don’t sit at the table in gala. My daughter, daughter-in-law, and I often dress nicely, but the men in the house prefer to be in sweatpants, haha… The most important thing is that everyone is relaxed and can enjoy themselves?”
It will also be the first Christmas without Rafa, your dear dog. Are you looking forward to that, or is that loss present every day and does Christmas not change much about that?
“The loss of Rafa was really a shock after 15 years. My God, how much you can love a dog. On his 15th birthday, he was still very lively. A bit harder to walk, but that he would become so sick a month later that we had to put him to sleep… No, I didn’t expect that. He lies in our garden, under a beautiful gravestone. Sometimes I sit with him and tell him everything that has happened. His two baskets are still there. And I had a Christmas bauble made with his photo on it. That way, he is still a bit with us.”
You just wrote a book about the power of aging. Has Christmas taken on a different meaning for you over the years?
“I know I’m going to sound very old-fashioned now, but the older you get, the more you realize that the people present are the gift. I also don’t really know what to put on my wish list anymore. That everyone is there, that’s what I like the most. Being grateful for your health is something that comes with age. When you are young, you find it very normal to feel great and to pull all-nighters. But that ‘later’ we always talked about, that is now, haha!”
Are you the type that waits with the tree until December 6, or do you say: ‘Sinterklaas and Christmas can perfectly coexist; I’ll set up that tree in November!’
“Richard’s birthday is December 6, and when the kids were small, we had Gift Evening on December 5 and then boom, the Christmas tree goes up in the morning. Now I put the tree up much earlier; the arrival of Sinterklaas is usually my cue. I think they can coexist perfectly. All those lights only bring more coziness.’
Artificial or real tree?
“I started with a real tree, but I didn’t find those needles a success with small children. I have had two artificial Christmas trees for years now: a snowy one that I always hang full of white ornaments, and a very lightly snowy one that is decorated in red. It may sound strange, but I also find it a bit sad for a pine tree that has worked hard for years only to be cut down for ‘coziness’. Also with a root ball, it doesn’t seem fun for such a tree: pulled out of the ground, sweating for a few weeks in such a warm house, and then back outside. Yes, I know it’s nonsense, haha… A lot of people actually love a real tree, also because of the wonderful pine scent. But an artificial Christmas tree with the lights already in it is just super handy.”
Do you have a recurring menu, or do you start trial cooking in early December?
“The ‘recurring menu’ is usually gourmetting for us: that always works, even with two left hands like me.”
What was your most beautiful Christmas ever?
“I don’t know if it was my ‘most beautiful’ Christmas, because there have been so many and every Christmas has something special. But last year Richard and I celebrated 30 years together and 25 years married, and we celebrated that with the kids and their partners in Orlando. We all love Disney, amusement parks, roller coasters, Star Wars, Marvel, Harry Potter – and you have that in abundance there. Plus, it’s always beautifully decorated for Christmas.”
And is there also a Christmas that you would prefer to hide in a far corner of your memory?
“When my brother and I were little, my parents still had a Christmas tree with real candles. We lit them one morning (when my parents were still in bed) and promptly the Christmas tree caught fire. That didn’t contribute to the atmosphere, I can tell you…”
Do you have a favorite Christmas playlist?
“No, not at all. In the weeks leading up to Christmas, I have heard all the songs so many times that I could take out Mariah. No playlist for me!”
Which Christmas movie is definitely watched every year?
“We usually do a few classics: the old Ghostbusters, or the first Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings. Last year we threw all the Aliens in. And Gladiator, of course. What a top movie.”
And then December 27: does that tree come out immediately, or do you wait until January 6 to collect needles?
“In Spain, where we often are, the tree stays up until Three Kings; that’s when the Spanish children get their presents. But to be honest… the day after Christmas, that tree already feels different, and after New Year’s it really has to go. New round, new chances!”
