With these steps, you will get over your failed situationship.
A situationship is fun, but not forever. Ultimately, you want to build something and settle down. No matter how nice you have it together, if it will never become anything more and you are looking for that, it might be better to put an end to it. Even though the relationship was never official, the ‘break-up’ won't be easy. These steps will help you get over your situationship.
Take (emotional) distance
If you have decided to end your situationship, it is better not to see each other for a while. This way, you can get used to how it is to move on without that person. You can of course block someone on all social media, but that is not necessarily required. As long as you can take that emotional distance for yourself. It is also not always possible to completely erase your former ‘partner’ from your life. If you have mutual friends, it may still happen that you see each other again. In that case, it is wise to set clear boundaries for yourself and not seek each other out too much. Keep the conversations casual and try not to be too vulnerable. You can still talk to each other, but it is important to keep listening to your feelings.
Acknowledge what the ‘relationship’ meant to you
Your situationship may never have made it to the official title of a relationship, but that doesn't mean it didn't feel that way. Perhaps your feelings were much stronger and you had already slapped that label on it as far as you were concerned. Reflecting on what was and what could have been helps in the process of getting over it. It also doesn't mean that you should get over your situationship any faster than a ‘real relationship’.
Be patient
You may have heard this advice a hundred times by now, but it is really true. There is no one golden rule for how long it should take to get over your situationship, or any relationship for that matter. It is different for everyone, and for you as well. Try not to rush yourself. Taking enough time is actually good to really process all your feelings and leave it behind completely before you open yourself up to new people.
Focus on what makes you happy
With every break-up, you will think a lot. What did I do wrong? Could I have prevented this? That constant worrying is not only very annoying, it is also incredibly exhausting. If you notice that you are overthinking too much, it is good to do something else for a while. You can read your favorite book, call a friend, or take a walk, as long as it makes you happy. This gives your mind a little breather and allows all the negative feelings to make way for some positivity.
Look at what you have learned
You may not be thinking about it at first, but your situationship can teach you a lot. Perhaps you have discovered that you are actually looking for something more stable. Or your ‘partner’ had certain traits that you found very attractive, or just the opposite. All this information can be useful when you step back into the dating scene.
Focus on new opportunities
Because you were so focused on what the other person wanted from you and where you stood, you weren't thinking about what you really want. Without realizing it, many opportunities may have passed you by. Focusing on personal growth is the perfect way to get over your situationship. It is again about you and your wishes. Perhaps you develop new interests, start a new hobby, or form new friendships - and who knows what might come of that.
Never forget: you are not alone
A situationship break-up can be very lonely. Not everyone will understand why you are struggling with the end of a relationship that never really existed. Don't forget, no matter how cliché it sounds, that you are really not the only one going through this. Surround yourself with nice people who lift you up and respect your feelings. It's time for you to put yourself back at number one.
