Solo sex is the key to an amazing sex life
Do you take the time for a spicy moment with yourself every now and then? Excellent news. It's not only good for your own pleasure, but it also has a particularly beneficial effect on the rest of your sex life.
Do you masturbate occasionally or more often? Then you are in good company, as around 60 percent of the Dutch do it once a week or more. Women typically take an average of 13 minutes for it, while men top that with a session of 15 minutes. Research from Easytoys shows that especially women find solo sex a nice way to relax. But that's not the only big advantage, as having some fun with yourself between the sheets has a particularly beneficial effect on the rest of your sex life.
Come as you are
The most important part of masturbating, in relation to those steamy sexual encounters, is that you discover what you enjoy. If you know what excites you, it immediately affects a session of sex with a partner. Why? Apparently, you are more willing to express to that person what you love. It's simply easier to show the way if you know the way yourself. That's why it's important that you first discover what turns you on.
Emily Nagski, the author of the book Come as You Are, strongly encourages solo sex. What am I saying? According to her, it is essential. She also emphasizes that a good sex life starts with self-knowledge. It is important to understand what holds you back or excites you. Masturbation is therefore not only about discovering turn-ons but also about exploring your boundaries. Nagski: “Women discover through masturbation for the first time what an orgasm feels like and how they can achieve it. This is crucial for sexual satisfaction, even with a partner.”
Since masturbation is usually the first introduction for a woman to an orgasm, she gains the right tools. Coming with yourself brings you much closer to an orgasm with a partner. This way, a woman can steer herself towards an orgasm during sex. By lending a hand or through clear communication with a partner. By the way, most sexologists agree on one thing: it doesn't really matter how often you take some me-time. Whether you masturbate often or rarely, both are healthy. Again, it’s about getting to know your own desires.
Little fantasies
And how do we prefer to do that? More than half of people sometimes use a sex toy. At the undisputed number one for women, with 60 percent, is the clitoral vibrator, better known as the famous and much-praised Satisfyer. The number two and three are reserved for the tarzan vibrator and dildo. By the way, the Netherlands is also not averse to seeking some external help when it comes to solo sex. For instance, 52 percent use porn (on) to get aroused, for 34 percent the fantasies simply come from their own imagination, and 11 percent get excited by erotic stories. It is indeed the men who more often fall back on porn, while women prefer to unleash their own little fantasy.
Relationship therapist and sexologist Esther Perel is also an advocate of discovering your own body. According to her, being curious about what excites you is the beginning of a satisfying sex life. Self-exploration enhances erotic well-being, as Perel calls it, and that is an important part of a relationship. She does not limit this to masturbation but looks at the bigger picture. The psychotherapist emphasizes that it is part of our overall well-being. And that brings you more in touch with yourself and thus also with others.
Source: Easytoys
