FRIENDS AT WORK

GOOD OR A VERY BAD IDEA?

“And you are going to do this project together with Hanneke, I am sure you will like her.” Those were the words of my supervisor a long, long time ago. Now we are twenty (or is it already twenty-two?) years later and we have seen all corners of life together.

We called each other when we rolled out of a hotel room with some wrong guy (only happened once of course) and it was also Hanneke who brought me some thick pads when I had just given birth.

After Hanneke came Marte and she was also introduced with the words; “Here is your intern Marte, I am sure you will be happy with her.” Et voilà, Marte broke into the top 5 of my dearest friends. We fell off our bikes at the same time after an evening with too much wine (also only happened once), we slept together in hotel rooms in Antwerp and Paris and she literally cried with me when something terrible happened to my oldest girl.

“Et voilà, Marte broke into the top 5 of my dearest friends.”

Furthermore, there are Asjha, Peggy, Harriet, and Agnès and of course Anouk and Fred. All intensely dear people whom I have met at ‘work’. I write this because there is a discussion about whether it is a good idea to form a friendship with someone you work with.

It could be clouding. Your supervisor might find such a friendship intimidating, it can put you in a difficult situation if there is only one promotion that you both covet. It could be difficult if you have to evaluate your friend, not to mention the awful moment when you would have to dismiss your friend's position.

I can imagine that there are many reasons not to do it. Perhaps there are even more cons than pros to list. But I have learned in my old age that I just can't do it; keep my distance. Especially not when there are such nice people fluttering around me. It's all or nothing. And then sometimes it's just hard and I sometimes bump my nose. In the meantime, I have had fun.

“I eventually got the job and Hanneke congratulated me immediately. That job turned out to be the worst of my life…”

Of course, I have also experienced the difficult situations. To make it full circle, I come back to Hanneke. The program we were working on suddenly stopped and there was a vacancy at another program. I eventually got the job and Hanneke congratulated me immediately. That job turned out to be the worst of my life (and I was gone after three weeks) and three weeks later Hanneke got her dream job, that of travel editor at Yorin Travel. Of course, Hanneke became the editor-in-chief and she still makes the most beautiful travel programs like ‘Floortje naar het einde van de wereld’ that Floortje and Hanneke make together.

So you see, if there is already a bump in your friendship path, real friends can overcome that. You had that relationship test right away.