The karaoke queen or the dance floor junkie?

WHICH OF THE 6 CHRISTMAS DRINKING TYPES ARE YOU?

We have it on Friday and you might too. The annual Christmas party is always a highlight where everyone drops their masks and shows their true nature. Give me your Christmas party and I'll tell you how your company is structured. Here comes my own colleague-at-the-Christmas-party psychoanalysis.

1. The karaoke queen

Let me start with myself. Every year I loudly and clearly declare that I am really too old to climb a stage. Only to, when the Christmas party arrives, be the first (yes really, the first) to grab the microphone and sing ‘Holiday’ or something. And yes, I am ashamed of this the next day. Can someone protect me from myself this year?

2. The mom-is-going-wild type

I'm afraid this label fits me a bit too, because I specially flew in my mother for the occasion (well, she comes from Overijssel by car but ‘flew in’ sounds so grand and captivating) so she can stay overnight and we don't have to worry for a second about earthly matters like ‘does the babysitter need to go home?’ and 'will the kids be okay?'.

3. The I-only-tell-you-colleague

You have those people who have collected the hottest office gossip all year, which they have managed to swallow out of discretion, but at Christmas they also need an outlet. Women can't keep secrets, remember? Feed them two Bellinis, stay strategically close to them and bet that they will spill the details about who has dived into the broom closet with whom this year?

4. The voyeur

Two and a half beers later and this type (usually a male) only looks at your heels and your cleavage. Hey, I'm talking to you. My eyes are a bit higher...

5. The dance floor junkie

Every company I've worked at has had one of these and we have one now too. No names. As soon as the last bite is eaten, this type pushes the tables aside and immediately goes completely WILD on the dance floor. Beware, because ‘alone is just alone’ is her motto, so she prefers to drag you into her lambada or breakdance trap and before you know it, you are the target of ridicule, mockery, and a lot of Facebook videos.

6. Little Miss Perfect

A type that drinks a Spa red (which is now called Spa Intense in an attempt to make it sound less bourgeois), while the rest of you have just set up the gin and tonic IV. She peeks over her glasses and keeps track of who has secretly gone out to smoke, how many alcoholic drinks have been consumed, and who has danced a bit too long and a bit too close together. And you can bet she will provide an extensive report the next day.

7. The half-half type

They either come for drinks or join after dinner. This kind of guest makes it fun for no one. Either you go and stay, or you skip it. But then you miss all those colorful colleagues that you finally see in their true light.

Need some tips on how to survive the Christmas party? Read this then just a moment...