5 x how to keep a secret anyway
It seems to be historically determined that we women gossip. While our men were out in the field to catch a cow (or lion or whatever edible), we had to guard the fort. And because we simply have less brute strength, it came down to knowledge for us. That's why the women whispered important information to each other that could help us. I'm not making this up, you know.. Whatever the case, we have a much greater need for you-didn't-hear-it-from-me than men do. And even if there might be an explanation for that, I can find it quite an annoying trait of mine that a piece of news must be passed on to the other as quickly as a burning coal. Hence, I have developed some secret-keeping strategies in my life.
Keep in mind that you score more with reliability.
- It seems very special to share a secret with someone you like. Unconsciously, you tell the other person that they are special to you because you share this secret with them. But it can also backfire negatively on you. The other person might think that you are quite loose-lipped. And that was not your intention.
Keep in mind that anyone can betray themselves.
- First of all, there is a good chance that the person you tell the secret to will also take it and run with it. And then that person, and then that person again. Feel free to assume that everyone will tell it to at least one other person. Even if you have found an extremely discreet person, they can still betray the secret with just one glance.
I once told someone that I.
was going to quit my job and even though that person was as discreet as an oyster, my supervisor still sensed something was off when he asked if I was still enjoying my job and she reacted a bit overly nonchalantly. Keeping secrets is cooler.
- Look, sharing news is of course nice and all. But if people later find out that you knew something for a long time, it reflects even better on yourself. Apparently, you were both aware in the first stage and super discreet. Double points then.
Write it down.
- If it really burns, that exciting piece of news, then it's an option to write it down. I do that sometimes when I'm very angry. Then I text myself what I actually want to say to that other person. Then the worst urge is over and I can switch to reason afterwards. Just try it; once you've written it down, the need to share it is smaller afterwards. Do delete it though, okay?
If you really want to tell it anyway...
- I'm always curious, sorry, a bit of a macabre thought, whether people all come to tell you their secrets when you're about to die. Because you can't do anything with it anyway and they really want to share it.
But well, if you really must pass something on, this is my advice; don't tell it to a woman and preferably tell it to a man who doesn't care about it.
Then the chance that the line stops there is greatest. Good luck!.
It seems to be historically determined that we women gossip. While our men were out in the field to catch a cow (or lion or whatever edible), we had to...
