Fun & Famous

5 excuses why it is perfectly normal that you don't have a sports car/Birkin bag/infinity pool/vacation home

Do you sometimes feel like everyone around you has, buys, and owns everything? And when you bravely try to join in, the ATM suddenly doesn't work for you while the money seems to be growing for everyone else?

They all have a house worth over a million in Amsterdam-Zuid, drive a sports car, have a little boat, and of course just bought a house in Ibiza as well. How is that possible? Don't worry, I can't arrange for you to suddenly fly first class, but I can give you five solid reasons why you wouldn't even want what they have. Haha.

1. That's why you don't have a Birkin bag

All nice and well, that Hermès, but it's just ridiculously heavy. I tried it again last week, but seriously, even if only your wallet is in it (which is probably completely empty when you bought this bag), you'll give yourself a hernia. So that's why you don't have it. Not because it's above your budget.

”So that's why you don't have it. Not because it's above your budget‘

2. And that's why you don't have a house in Ibiza

Well, Ibiza. That was totally your thing ten years ago. Now it's a bit... well, what can you say. Nice to go to occasionally. But to have a house... A bit tacky. And yes, you know, especially in the summer when it's nice to go to your vacation home, you actually don't want to be in Ibiza. Way too crowded, too much drugs, too everything. (All lies of course, because I love Ibiza and I will definitely go there in August, but you wouldn't say that..)

3. That sports car, what are you doing to yourself

You only get fines, people aren't nice to you when you drive such a flashy car, and nothing fits in it. No way, not for you.

4. And you don't need that boat either

Do you know what Jort Kelder says? Everything that floats or flies; don’t buy but hire. People who bought a boat had two good days. The day they bought their boat and the day they sold it. A boat is a hassle. And it's expensive. You'd be better off renting a boat with a captain ten times a year and hey, also a magnum bottle of champagne, because that's still cheaper than buying one. Here by the way tips on how to survive a day of sailing.

5. You don't even have a cleaner

You're just very precise and meticulous and trust no one with your precious belongings.