5 intimate sex questions that women dare not ask
Now women freely talk a lot about sex. About threesomes, how to handle ‘a crazy penis’ in bed (just don’t), biggest bed blunders and yes, also about porn – so women’s porn. But no matter how often you talk about what happens between the sheets with your girlfriends, there are always those questions that you just don’t bring up during the Friday afternoon drinks. Luckily, our colleagues from the British Marie Claire did dive into it and asked experts to answer five intimate questions from women. You ready?
Sometimes I can’t get enough for a few weeks in a row, the month after I have ZERO desire. How can I make my ‘sex drive’ more consistent?
“Your sex life will always consist of peaks and valleys due to hormonal fluctuations. Your libido rises just before your period and when you ovulate. Conversely, stress negatively affects your desire. Additionally, keep in mind that it takes women on average 20 minutes longer than men to really get aroused. A good trick is to ‘think’ yourself aroused before you’re even close to each other. Don’t wait until you’re in bed. Prepare yourself, as it were, for a possible sexual encounter. Bet it helps?”
What can I do to have better orgasms while masturbating?
“Even if you’re in a relationship; please yourself as much as possible. We don’t have a maximum limit on the number of orgasms per week. You can compare it to a marathon: the more you run, the further you can run. Train those muscles as much as possible and you’ll notice that your body will respond more easily.”
“You ready?”
When we first met, we easily had sex five times a week. A year later and it’s one or two times. What is average?
“At the beginning of a relationship, your brains are ‘high’ in the same way as a drug addict. So it makes sense that there’s a lot of sex. But that intensity is really only for a short period; it’s also impossible to function normally otherwise. Most couples indeed have sex once or twice a week. But prioritize quality over quantity. That friendly couple that claims to have sex every night might not have a good sex life at all, while your weekly sex session is amazing. If you’re both satisfied with your sex life, forget averages quickly.”
I think about other men I know while having sex with my partner. Does that mean I’m bored with him?
“Suppose you think about a colleague from work, then it’s likely that several women in the office have had exactly the same thoughts. Researchers have found that 80 percent of women fantasize about someone they actually know. In contrast to 75 percent of men who tend to fantasize about, for example, porn actresses in general. So while he thinks about random naked female bodies, you envision a movie scene with that hot guy from the train. It’s completely normal and not a sign that your relationship is failing.”
My boyfriend and I haven’t had sex for a few weeks. Does that mean he doesn’t want me anymore?
“It’s been proven that married men and men in relationships have lower testosterone levels. Why? Because he no longer has to ‘fight’ for the grand prize: and that’s you. But don’t worry, many couples experience this sooner or later. How to boost it again? Forget the whole ‘having to have sex’ thing for a moment. In fact: impose a sex ban for the next two weeks. Take those two weeks to cherish each other and take care of one another. Massages, walks, cooking together… It may sound cheesy, but by taking the time to be intimate outside the bedroom, you’ll see drastic results back in the bedroom at the end of the two weeks.”
