Fun & Famous
RENSKE WENT SHOPPING DRUNK AND THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED
Yes people! So I was drunk again. And of course I am fundamentally terribly sorry about that, but should I now start pretending that I wasn't? Besides, it's already in the title, so then it becomes my word against the word of the title and that can get pretty ugly discussions, I can tell you. Anyways, so I had way too much whisky up. After all, you drink far too much of that unnoticed (or well, not quite unnoticed of course). Besides, I had beautiful crystal whisky glasses and (at first) I looked far too good with one of those on my lip, so I couldn't possibly stop drinking in the context of Facebook. But what I want to say: I had just received a substantial deposit of money and was therefore shopping very hard while drinking. Like: swipe swipe, shop shop shop, everything in Bassie's basket, enter address, iDEAL, ING BANK, pack it up, come on with that shit and now another sip. But now I know: that has its pros and cons. Here they come.
BEFORE drunken online shopping
1. All sorts of great big surprises show up on your doormat in the days after shopping, because, after all, you forgot all about what you bought. And that is, I can't say otherwise, FABELHAFT.
2. It's even more fun if you have ordered things from different online shops, because then you get a surprise on your doormat every day for a week because of the different delivery dates. Is it trousers? Is it shoes? Is it a dress? Oh, it ís a dress. It's two dresses! It's three dresses! It really is a delightful guessing game I can tell you.
3. So you buy things you would otherwise find too expensive. Because when you're drunk, every hundred euros feels like a tenner, doesn't it. And that's good, because sometimes you just have to let things go.
4. I don't actually know if this is a good or bad thing, but so you buy items you wouldn't think of purchasing in a sober state. For instance, I have a Levi's 501 Time Gone By bought, you know, with one of those high nineties asses. Have yet to see when I will put it on, but I have it in the house and that is the first and most important step towards a nineties ass and you seem to want that this summer.
AGAINST drunk shopping
1. You have to be extremely careful not to buy two identical trousers, because when you are drunk you can't see which number is in a the ‘number box’. Experienced it myself.
2. And oh yes, this one is bad too. So I had forgotten that I had a personal shopping link in my mailbox to shop at 30 per cent off. But so I was too drunk to remember and so I paid full price. When I found that out, I knew for sure: the world is evil.
3. Look, as fun as that drunken online shopping may be: you also have to eat the next day (basically). Anyway, my balance had changed from +1200 to -249.95 in two hours. And I tell you, I can be in the red up to -250 euros, and 5 cents won't buy you anything these days. No, not even a frog at the pool. That may have been true in the past, but times have changed.
4. Just think of all the problems that will arise if you don't fit or like half of it, because you have to send it all back and it's now a week since I went shopping drunk and I'm still in between boxes, it's like moving house, it doesn't have to get any crazier!
So, this was it. As you can see, there are 4 pros and 4 cons. It's practically higher maths. So now it's up to you guys whether you'd like to do some drunken web shopping of your own sometimes. Good luck to all of you in deciding!
