The 12 phases of getting drunk with your best girlfriends
When this goes online, I'll still be lying like a starfish in bed including the accompanying Friday night hangover. Because yesterday I went through these 12 phases with a number of my girlfriends. Admit it: weekends with your friends always look like this, right?
1. The pre-game
As in: the moment the first alcoholic drink is consumed. The plans for the evening are discussed and potential flings are reviewed. In phase 1, you are still at your soberest (naturally).
2. The pre-game continues
The glasses are refilled, the outfits for the evening are finalized, and the music is turned up a few decibels. That one album you all love (American Teen in my case with my besties) is played and everyone sings along beautifully off-key. This is the moment when everyone has really caught the vibe.
3. Time for Insta
If you want to capture something decent from the evening, you need to do it now. Everyone still looks fabulous and in a few hours that’ll be a different story.
4. Dancing queen
You’ve made it to the city, standing somewhere in a bar or club, a fresh drink in hand… Time for some dancing. Sexy, sultry, ridiculous, and exaggerated: anything goes, you see it all. And every group of girlfriends always has that one person who brings out their inner Beyoncé but dances incredibly off-beat. Love it.
5. The emo moment
Where everyone declares their love for each other and expresses how happy they are together. And hey, another shot to celebrate how happy you are with your friendship, because that definitely deserves a toast.
6. Wing woman duty
One of your friends has spotted a target. Time for ‘wing woman duty’. Don’t forget the ten golden rules of ‘wing woman etiquette’. But this can also be the moment when you or your friend has had just a bit too much to drink, leading to silly things like texting an ex. Don’t. Do. It. Help each other out here. I recently came across the most brilliant meme that said: ‘Pro tip: order 2 drinks at a time so both your hands are full and you can’t text nobody you shouldn’t.’ The best advice EVER.
7. Round of nostalgia or just an intense laughing fit
Because suddenly everything is hilarious. You’re super silly and can’t do anything but laugh the whole time. It’s good for your abs, though. Gin and tonic on the side?
8. Oof, the social media takeover
Well, as much as you don’t want to do it, suddenly your Stories are filled with the craziest videos of you and your friends. Yikes, let’s hope your boss doesn’t check those Stories...
9. TEQUILAAAA
Or yes, other shots are fine too. Once again, it’s time to toast. And that bartender should join in too.
10. Texted that ex anyway...
11. Fries with, s’il vous plaît
That damn snack bar. Why does it always bother you when you’ve been out partying? Okay, okay, throw in two croquettes as well.
12. One more episode
Finally home. Oh come on, you’re not that tired. One episode of Modern Family should still be doable. Sleep tight.
