“DO YOU WANT CHILDREN?”
Why you actually don't want to ask that question anymore
Hear hear for Katja Herbers. She explains in the most friendly and pleasant way on national TV that the question about the desire for children can be a sensitive one. Something you don't ask a woman about another woman, no matter how sincerely it's asked.
You know Katja from her (slightly awkward) role in Divorce. As Joyce, where it’s actually all about having children. With Waldemar Torenstra, so we get that. But in real life, she might want to answer that question, but just prefers not to be asked. “You know what I think? That as a woman, you shouldn't ask another woman about children. Let me explain it very well for the viewers at home. It’s of course annoying when you’re over thirty and people keep asking: ‘Do you want children? Do you want to get pregnant?’ Who knows, someone might have been trying IVF for five years and it’s a very emotional and complicated process,” Katja explains on RTL Boulevard. Not that this is the case for her and her boyfriend, because she simply hasn’t had the time for it yet. I find that a plausible reason, even though she really doesn’t have to explain it.
I am thirty. Almost nine years together with a boyfriend. I have a nice job. And a nice roof over my head. That’s why I get the same question as Katja. Not whether I want to become big in Hollywood (too bad, missed opportunity for you directors), but whether I want kids, within what timeframe exactly and why yes and more often why not. Including details and enough arguments if possible. Sometimes I find that quite difficult. Especially when you hear that people see me and my beloved as nice parents to be. Where children would have fun as mom and dad and we are actually just us, without thinking too much about it.
The co-parenting of dog Saar suits us sehr gut. I don’t get rattling parts when I see babies. My love has the rule that a child must be funny before we serve as babysitters. And in the meantime, I just hope that everyone asks a little less, because when was the last time someone had to explain that they do want children? And then I’ll give you a proper explanation later over a good bottle of white, because that will surely happen without the question feeling embarrassing or misplaced. But only if you take this with you.
So not wanting to ask anymore, but just waiting until it’s that type of conversation. Everyone will be happier with that, including Katja.
