Science explains

Why men don't say anything after one night of sex

The flirts, the game played, it worked: you’re lying together catching your breath in bed. What. A. Night.

Everything went exactly according to plan and you walk out the door with a smile from ear to ear. The sex was everything you had hoped for. And he is everything you had hoped for. What. A. Man. Radiantly, you walk the walk of shame home. The world is made of sugar, the sky is pink, and through your eyes, you see only hearts and rainbows. Skip, skip. Your work is suddenly more fun than ever, you chatter away with joy, and you’re excited about getting up at 7.

But then it goes quiet. Nothing. Silence. The best man – the father of your children – sends you nothing. No little message. No smiley. No nudge, wave, or poke. The sky turns black and you boil inside. The uncertainty overwhelms you. Why doesn’t he say anything? Did he not find you attractive, did he not enjoy the hookup, or were you not funny enough in the morning? WHAT. IS. GOING. ON?

First of all, you don’t need to worry too much. No. It’s not your fault. For once, it really isn’t. Sex simply works differently for men than for women. When a woman orgasms, larger amounts of the hormone oxytocin are released, making us more affectionate. Clingy, if you will. Even if you don’t want it, sex automatically leads to attachment and hearts for a woman. Not for men. No no, men have had their share and are currently done with it for now.

But then it goes quiet. Nothing. Silence.

If he wants to commit to you and he knows that, believe us, no matter how hard it is, he will definitely say something. Even if it’s just something small. A monkey smiley or an x. That’s good news. No news is unfortunately really less good news in this case. The chance is small that he suddenly pops up months after your one and only hookup with a wink and a pressing question. The chance is greater that he has long moved on. From an evolutionary perspective, this is also completely logical. Men need to spread their seed so they can produce more offspring. We women want a man who protects us – especially when children come – and so we become a bit more clingy after a hookup. Because after sex, there’s always a chance of a child, after all. And so we want a man who brings home the bacon and keeps predators at bay. We can’t help it. Still, it’s unfair, yes.

Because that was in the past. And if you really hear nothing after the spontaneous night of partying in 2017, you might as well let your flame die out quickly. A small consolation: being dry for a while is not so bad for you.

Fortunately, it was just one night; you’ll really forget it quickly, believe us. Hop on to the next pink sky with rainbows. Because honestly; before you know it, he is perfect and you’re sitting on the couch every evening sipping tea together. And then you’ll nostalgically think back to all your classy, unanswered walks of shame.

FACTS

– The longest kiss ever lasted 417 hours. Smackeroo.
– According to researchers, you are more likely to fall in love if you have just moved.
– “Does it hurt, falling from the sky?” Research shows that pickup lines really don’t work.