Undateables after your thirties

I am the youngest at home of three girls. My oldest sister passed thirty a few years ago, then you have my sister M who slightly panicked because oh dear, in a few months she will also be in her dirty thirties. Don’t worry, Merch (inside joke), thirty is the new twenty. They say.

Now I am from the very last year of the 80’s and unlike my sisters happy single, so that thick 3-0 is still hiding for a little while (breathe in, breathe out), but I have heard from a few friendly thirty-somethings that these are the men I really should not waste my time on once I hit my third decade. So until August 2019, I can still enjoy myself (lovely, right, that single life).

The DJ

Don’t immediately think of a Sunnery or a Calvin Harris (you let go of a good one, Taylor), but a type that after thirty years is still a ‘struggling musician’. Well, he must be really very lucky if he still makes it. But girl, if he hops from one temporary job to another to support his music career, then he is also a temporary boyfriend.

The bad boy

Ooh, the guy you will forever have a weakness for but you just know that he is not the one for you.. He calls you when it suits him and will never commit to you. The word ‘serious’ is not yet in his vocabulary and you are probably tired of that casual dating, right?

The mama’s boy

If he is sweet to his mother, he is of course a keeper. But there are limits. If his mother is still ironing his shirts, doing his dishes, cooking for him every evening, and cleaning his house, that is not sexy. And especially not at a later age.

The taken man

also the eleven reasons why you absolutely want to stay here according to May. this just why you should never start something with a taken man. And this applies to every age, not just after your thirties.

“Very asexual this. Yes, I really said that.”

The workaholic

There is nothing wrong with a man with a good work ethic. But if you are really looking for someone to settle down with, you also want someone who knows how to balance work and private life. If at some point you realize that he hardly makes time for you because he is constantly working, you should think carefully about whether you want to spend another evening alone or prefer to spend that evening looking for someone who does have time for you.

The man who loves himself more than he loves you

Common sense, don’t you think?

The insecure one

Alright, this comes from personal experience. Sure, I am also insecure in many areas, but you just need a bit of spice in life. Get out of your comfort zone. Once I dated a guy who kept saying how unhappy he was with his job (which he had for more than five years), where he lived, and then he had a laundry list of other things. But did he do anything about it? Nope. And believe me, there’s only so much you can handle, because at some point you also become very unhappy in your relationship if your partner is so unhappy but does nothing about it #boybye.

The man who still lives with his friends

And I mean in a bachelor pad with friends where the kitchen is full of dirty dishes. He hasn’t changed his bed in weeks, and there are cans of beer and bottles of wine everywhere. Very asexual this. Yes, I really said that. He is a bit (very long) stuck in student housing life. So that serious relationship you are looking for? That will take a while.

Age is just a number, but if you are seriously looking for your happily ever after? According to the thirty-somethings, it will take even longer with these men.