Why you should never unfriend your ex on Facebook

After those times of heart clouds, kisses, and sweet cookies, it's now finito and over, and you could drink each other's blood. You would prefer to toast to it in the pub.

There is nothing left of the love between you, and you know that for sure. Get lost with that guy, come on. You move on with your life. And everything is fine. Until you see a photo of the best man flash by on that damn Facebook in your timeline. Well, goddamn... Is he wearing that sweater that YOU gave him on his birthday? Is that that pretty girl THAT HE JUST KNOWS FROM WORK next to him? What has he done with his hair? Why is he laughing so happily? Has he lost weight? Just peeking at his friends list. Who are all those new people?!?!?! Well, goddamn... Within two clicks, it's done: you've unfriended him. Bye and regards.

Still, you better NOT remove your ex from your expertly crafted list of Facebook Friends. Scientists have actually looked into this for you, and they have written down their answers in the fairly serious article Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking. In short: nothing to laugh about and wave away, this. Because experts suggest that it's better to just keep your ex on your friends list, (ever looked closely at this word? Neither did we. Until now). People who simply kept their former lover as a Facebook buddy have were single less sexual desires for their ex AND they were less sad about the break-up.

Look, here's the thing: if you have a former flame with whom the flame has gone out but you don't know anything about his life anymore because you can't peek on social media, you only become more curious. It makes it a bit more romantic in your head. Oh, how handsome he actually was. And oh, how much fun we had together actually. You distort the truth – because you simply can't SEE that truth. As soon as you discover on Facebook that he still lives in that little village, currently dating a blood boring girl and that he still has that silly job – look, THEN you feel good. No butterfly desperately fluttering around anymore. And you never know what you're missing if you can't keep up with each other through the wonderful world of online profiles.

According to experts, staying friends on Facebook actually helps you if you want to recover after a breakup. But, researchers say, you better not constantly check his page. As in: every day. Or multiple times a day. That makes you more emotional and can make you feel even worse. But as long as you stick to this and occasionally accidentally peek at his ugly, dull profile picture, then you're good.

Of course, it's also nice to know that he sees what he's missing when you upload a new, handsome profile picture. Ha. So I have dried up nicely, old (Facebook) friend. At least you can move on with a calm heart to the next loser. Hooray.

FACTS

• Women have an average of more exes than men. Women have an average of 5.9 relationships and men 5.5. In Finland, they take it the most seriously: there they have an average of 9 long relationships.
• On average, we have 7.3 sexual partners in our lives.
• The French love it and have lured an average of about 17 hotties into their beds. Maybe because everyone knows that phrase: ‘Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?’ That one. And we hear you singing it.

Written by Tessa Heinhuis