You wear this on King's Day

Meters of orange tompouce, a red-white-blue polish on the nails and an anti-hangover powder before the match starts. Long live Wim-Lex, we can have the Oranjebitter, because it's almost King's Day. And back in the day, you could get away with a Bavaria dress; I have a solution that will make you look way better and make you laugh. It can't get any better. Rumag is the reason I will change four times on King's Day. I can't choose, they are all equally brilliant.

First of all, I want: YOU.ARE.DRUNK

Secondly: KING.GIN

In third place: THERE.NEEDS.TO.BE.A.QUEEN

And to wrap it up: ORANGE.IS.NOT.REALLY.MY.COLOR

But I thought this was it, only then I suddenly also saw BITTERBALR (admit it, nice parody), WILLEM.OF.CHAMPAGNE (how hilarious) and I.AM.NOT.DRUNK (seems clear to me). So there's a good chance I'll have to change into a different shirt six times. I'll just do it, I don't care.