Hooray: it's a party when your partner has a hangover

There he is. Like a true ballerina. Both arms behind his ears, one leg bent – as if he is in some sort of one-sided plié.

Then I know what time it is: mister is hungover. Dead hungover. He mumbles something unintelligible about water and Sahara dryness and gestures weakly with an arm towards the tap. I get the hint. With a little Advil and a glass of aqua I come back, he downs everything in one gulp and with his watery little eyes he asks if we can please have shawarma for lunch. Or McDonald's. He burps up some Flügeltjes and scratches through his beer-smeared hair. Then he turns around and goes back to sleep. He needs it. I find it almost sad.

So it’s delightful when your guy has a bad hangover and you don’t. Here’s the thing. You suddenly don’t have to do anything that day. He has no energy for anything and he has no desire for anything, so you have the best excuse ever to also snuggle up on that couch. All the plans you had together are canceled without hesitation and that gives you some wonderfully spontaneous space. You know, to read a good book.

Moreover, it also applies: if he can eat McDonald's or shawarma, then you can too. And chips. And cola. And chocolate. And everything that makes you feel better. You can shamelessly take advantage of his craving for fatty food. Eating together is just a bit more fun. And yes, even without a hangover, that ordered pizza tastes great.

Ah, all those benefits of a hungover man. Here are some more:

1. You can finally sleep in. His alarm is gone.
2. You can finally go to bed early. Now he’s already asking at half past eight if he can take a nap. You’re happy.
3. You can finally watch on Netflix what you feel like. He’s out cold anyway.
4. You can finally get your way: he’s saying yes to everything right now. ‘Dinner at your parents’ tomorrow, booking that vacation to Bali, ordering that expensive Smeg toaster together?' He thinks everything is fine because he has other things on his mind. Namely: his pounding head.
5. You can have all your packages delivered without him complaining that you shop online too much.
6. You can finally feel wonderfully fit and pretty without having to exercise.
7. You can finally have sex in the middle of the day. He’s not getting out of bed anyway.
8. Hey babe, thanks again for all those chicken nuggets. They were delicious.

FACTS

• On average, we have a hangover for 744 days in our lives. In other words: more than two years.
• Good genes: about 25-30 percent of people never have a hangover.