Amayzine

Kiki's mole talk

week 1

Did you think you were done with me after Expedition Robinson Expedition Robinson? HAHA. I don’t think so, peepz. After a little winter nap, this mole is ready to dig through the earth for a bit of spectacle and ‘trust nobody’ whispers. So buckle up, TV fans, from NOW on Amayzine is officially renamed Amolzine.

In the coming weeks, I will spam you every Monday afternoon with all the suspicious actions from the latest episode, suspicions, and more Inspector Gadget nonsense. And to keep it cozy and interactive: my mailbox kiki@amayzine.com and my Insta @kikiduren are officially open for all the craziness you encounter, so if you happen to think over the weekend: what is he/she doing?!, just email me, and I will bundle all your findings, the more chance we have to unmask the Mole this year on time. Because, eh, I was a bit late with Thomas last year. All Diederik's fault.

Anyway, time to talk about this first episode of the season. Wow, what an opening this was, huh. 2.7 million viewers clean on the hook. Time for an overview of everything I thought while watching and of course the first remarkable actions in a row.

1. Ah, I knew it! Who is the Mole? has, just like Expedition Robinson, asked a number of unknown Dutch people this year, nice! Oh, not? Uh, wait...

2. Stop. Why have I been watching this program for ten minutes and I have no idea where I actually am? Who is Stine Jensen? Where is Art? A very serious mindfuck for people with OCD, this. What is happening here, people?

3. Come on, Kiek. Just keep watching calmly. The task starts in pairs. Find a safe in the city/2000 euros and/or two jokers. Wait a minute, did I hear that right? Someone is going home at the end of the task? Someone who hasn't even seen Art yet?

4. OMG OMG MINDFUCK! OTHER COUNTRIES! CHAOS! COMPLETE PANIC! UPHEAVAL! RUSSIA, KAZAKHSTAN, AZERBAIJAN, UKRAINE AND ARMENIA. EFFING BIZARRE THIS. TWITTER EXPLODES. APPLAUSE FOR THE CREATORS. YES, THIS NEEDS TO BE IN CAPITAL LETTERS.

5. Jan Versteegh I love you, but what were you doing, man. First, you don't want to spread among the rest of the group that Jean-Marc found Tbilisi as a solution (while collaboration is required in the task) and then Loes casually gives you ‘M18’ as a code and you still call Art for 1,000 euros for exactly the same hint.

6. Speaking of calling, the Mole knows of course that the calling should be done as late as possible to take as much money from the pot as possible. Simone and Bella play ‘only’ 500 from the pot, while Ron and Loes, Jan and Jean-Marc, and Stine and Emilio (the latter even two (!) times) call Art for 1,000 euros.

7. That's it. I'm going to record a new voicemail NOW. “The next voicemail you leave costs 1000 euros.” No, but Art, seriously, if you have debts you can just say that, dude.

8. Yeah, bye. They are making it very easy this year. Jean-Marc is wearing a butt catcher pants = extra space for his bells = mole = JEAN-MARC IS THE MOLE!!! #HowDoYouMeanSpeculations?!

9. Okay, joking aside, maybe I'm already going overboard with tunnel vision, but Emilio has called for 2000 euros (Stine too, by the way) AND missed 2000 euros by not paying attention at the boulevard and missing the envelope while he was looking exactly in the right direction AND he doesn't want to share the hint he got from Art with his team, which means they also have to call, which costs money. Yes, that's a painfully long sentence. Emilio, you're at the top of my Mole radar, dude. Just so you know.

10. The real moles in this episode are the taxi drivers. What a bunch of idiots, unbelievable.

11. I also think it would be super nice if there were just two moles once and they didn't know about each other...

12. Two things are already certain: we all love Ron Boszhard (something with the new Jochem van Gelder of this season) and Mr. is

most likely going to return. Here’s the proof:

  • No farewell music for Ronnie (I mean: that MUST be right?)
  • Art did not say the sentence ‘... except the Mole, who never goes home’ in the intro text
  • In the intro, we also see Ron in Georgia, right?
  • And there weren't ten plane tickets bought for nothing? Waste of kerosene? Hello?
  • Hey, wait. Also at the end of the episode no announcement that Ron is at Radio 2 tomorrow! THAT'S IT. RON IS ON ELIMINATION ISLAND AND IS COMING BACK.

13. I still caught some Mole talk. If Chris Zegers says ‘goosebumps moment goosebumps moment!!!’ one more time in that turtleneck, I will literally eat my way into the ground of my living room. Please give that guy Ritalin.

Current status based on my Mole radar?

  1. Comedian Emilio Guzman (SUSPICIOUS, MOTHERF*CKER!)
  2. Writer Stine Jensen (wasted a lot of money this episode, quite suspicious)
  3. Cartoonist Jean-Marc van Tol (could be a very good Mole)
  4. Journalist Simone Weimans (trust nobody, keep an eye on her for a while)
  5. Presenter Jan Versteegh (I think he is a bit too hard for a real Mole)
  6. Fashion designer Olcay Gulsen (meh no, too much money earned)
  7. Actress Loes Haverkort (too enthusiastic, absolutely not the Mole)
  8. Singer Bella Hay (I don't really know why, but I say: fine candidate)
  9. Singer Ruben Hein (same)
  10. Presenter Ron Boszhard (bye bye, Ronnie. Or not? Time will tell...)

Well, will I see you little moles here again next Monday? Cozy. Heart at the bottom if you're also über über excited for next week. Yeah sorry, can’t help it.

P.S.: For those who missed it: I was on a real Who is the Mole?-trip in Portland, Oregon. And we went EXACTLY to the places where the candidates have also been, the best trip of my life. Just check the video.

P.P.S.: On my Insta Stories @kikiduren you can still laugh about the funniest Mole quotes, you know it. Bye mole darlings. Love!