TEMPTATION ISLAND GIBBERISH

episode 5

We were already warned. Episode 5 would be an intense one. And not the good kind of intense. I think I've never seen something so boring in my life. Yawn*. Yes, sorry. Not very surprising, of course. The footage from the first campfire caused last week the temptation to reach a peak. And yes – you can take that quite literally. Megan and Joshua went at it and everyone seems a little out of sorts that this happened on day four of the cheating game. It still lingers a bit in the group. While the men go on a group date sailing, the women get a chance to peek at their boys in the villas. Sounds all very mysterious that spying, but it wasn't.

Well then, shall we? Let's see if there's anything to chat about this boring week regarding Temptation Island.

1. Just do it the next time the intro starts. Whisper “Temptation.” Really the best.

2. My god. I'm only just now hearing The Awkward Creaking of Joshua and Megan's bed for the first time. People, edit that out, awkwardness to the max here.

3. The. Butt. Of. Joshua. HOOOO BOOTAAAAAAYYY in the house.

4. If I see the image of a ‘crying’ Deborah saying ‘Iek mies Tim eel hard’ one more time, I'm going to attack someone.

5. I'm really so done with those fluorescent pants, guys. It's unbearable.

6. Oh, help. Just when you think life can't get worse, Tim gives a kiss to the wrong vacation photo of Deborah. #JustADropOfVomitOnTheGround.

7. Shouldn't they have placed that Gino among the single ladies or is that just me? I hear Yana's spot will be available soon...

8. “He expertly covers his microphone.” HAHA. And then says it into someone else's microphone. Smart move!

9. Fire camp. Campfire. Fire campfire. It's difficult, isn't it?

10. Do you also always find the bacon-and-bean seducers so sad? A bit like the kid who gets picked last during gym. And are those people all eight in one room or what?

11. Andreas: “Let's play a game where everyone can ask questions.”

The only one asking FUCKING questions is Andreas.

12. Seducers: ‘I am not a second choice’

Wait a minute. Aren't you already that as a seducer, um, anyway?

13. Tim: ‘I really want to see dolphins or sharks now. Then I'm going straight into the water.” Straight into the water with sharks? CRAZY.

14. Deborah Leemans – Miss Elegance 2017.

Kiki Düren – Girlfriend of Brad Pitt.

15. Okay, but Danielle is going crazy now because he sprayed his cologne? Child, get a grip.

16. Megan, please had flushed his toothbrush down the toilet, HAHAHA.

17. Wait a minute. Sjeriesj with the snorting laugh falls for Tim. What? Am I understanding this correctly? Cherish? Tim her type? Do people even exist who have Tim as their type? Holy fuck, that's going to be interesting next week...

P.S.: What we are giving away this week on my Instagram @kikiduren? 3x the ‘You’ve got ‘wipt’ cream package’, a super hot night grabbing tits with Mezdi and an evening checking out Timon and Pumba at Lion King with Andrea. Provided he leaves that creepy earring at home.

P.P.S.: Did you also find this episode boring? And can't you wait for the next campfire where Kevin faces Megan's pony skills? Heart at the bottom! Wow wow, already looking forward to it. Hakuna matata!