To all moms: be kinder to each other

For me, the glass is always half full: I always try to start from the positive, because life is then (even in unpleasant moments) still a bit nicer. Even in the sometimes somewhat competitive entertainment world, this works well for me. But at the moment I stepped into ‘the wonderful world of mothers’ I had to swallow for a moment... The amount of commentary and negativity among each other is gigantic. In no single ‘group’ are there so many mafia clubs on the move: the babywearing mafia, breastfeeding mafia, and so on. I genuinely wonder where all that negativity comes from: do we so desperately want to let others know at their expense that our opinion is the only right one? Is a mother who perhaps has a different view on a certain subject immediately a bad mother?

It genuinely worries me, in any case. Motherhood is already exciting and intensive enough, let alone when you are constantly being tapped on your fingers at every step. I was thrown off for about a day when I proudly posted a photo of my first babywearing knot attempt (which was confirmed by my maternity helper) and received dozens of comments about what was wrong. I didn't touch that thing for a week because I was terrified I would do it wrong. Or when I posted a lovely summery photo on the beach where I had already mentioned as a precaution that Otis was wearing factor 50 and clearly had a little hat on, but many mothers still found it important to emphatically state that he really also needed to wear sunglasses. I was already happy that he kept that hat on, let alone that he would accept a pair of sunglasses.

The book ‘Siddhartha’ taught me the wise lesson that every individual must discover their own life path, without being guided by too many opinions from others. Often you have to walk a certain path yourself to find out that it is not the right one, instead of having heard this from others.

Of course, it is nice to receive tips and tricks during that exciting ‘mother-search journey’, but can we try to present this with a bit more tact and love? Can we, as mothers among ourselves, see the glass a bit more often as half full and let everyone be themselves? Because I dare to bet that all women who are mothers only want the best for their child, and that is, in my opinion, the only thing that matters.