Why you have secrets from each other in a good relationship

That I do have that dress new and that it’s not from last year and that it certainly costs more than a hundred euros: look, he doesn’t always need to know exactly for sure.

Secrets exist in every relationship. And that’s not such a disaster, it turns out. Nothing naughty or mischievous about it. According to experts, you would actually do well to occasionally keep something secret from your man. Especially the trivial, unimportant things, like that new slightly too expensive summer dress yes, which you’re already tired of after three weeks. He doesn’t need to know that either, how often you’ve worn which piece of clothing exactly before you’re done with it. You’re silly.

What you should tell each other? All the things that are important for your future together. For example, I would never lie about debts, savings, salary, a desire for children, and a puppy wish. However, I might lie about how much I love the food he cooked, while, well, I’m not really a big fan of winter stews with eight types of meat. I would never lie about what I feel, what I think, what I want in life, and what I wish for him. No. But it’s in those little things, right? That dress. Those heels that indeed accidentally are in three colors in the closet. That my perfume doesn’t cost 80 euros but 150 euros per mini-30-pip-milliliter bottle. That I text that I’ve already cleaned the house only to then zoom around the floor with a yellow cloth within four seconds. That I’ve had the screen of my iPhone repaired at least three times for 180 euros because I’ve dropped it on the stone street at least three times. I admitted that it happened once. Fine, right?

Just as men will also have some secrets for their partner. For example, I think he sometimes hides how many beers he had with his friends at the football were. Definitely more than three. And he will also sometimes say that he was home at 2 AM while it was actually 5 AM. Or that he thinks your new dress is beautiful while he secretly thinks ’meh‘. It happens. In the best relationships, indeed. Because you don’t want to hurt each other over every silly thing. You want not to argue over every unimportant little point.. That’s why we do it, keeping those mini-secrets. Nothing wrong with that: this way you keep it fun and this way you can at least argue about things that really matter.

On to the next slightly too expensive summer dress therefore.