15x you recognize this if you are a shopaholic

If a colleague asks you if you could write an article about being ‘shopaholic’, what does that say about you? I, uh, just ask it.

It's a disaster. It's an illness. It's no longer fun. I don't find it fun anymore either, but I can't help but open those apps every evening. Every day I lurk at what's new at H&M, Zara, or if the sale at Bijenkorf has started, or if Zalando still has those boots in my size, or if Mango still sells nice basics and then you have those countless webshops on Instagram calling my name. I can't even post a photo on Instagram before I fill in my address for a dress that suddenly appears in my shopping cart and I've clicked through four influencers for the latest hairpin. Just before going to bed, I still want to order that turtleneck in color number six. Greeting the package delivery person by name and that he even knows my children's names. It's a disaster. An illness.

You recognize this if you, like me (and my dear colleague), are just a little bit of a shopaholic:

1. My friends hardly know that Zara has its own app. I am a gold member.

2. That people say: ‘But okay, just go to Gamma. You won't just take a toolbox home because you like it, right?’ Oh yes, no problem. In every store, everywhere, I can find something I want.

3. Having to declutter your closet every month because it no longer fits. My sister is happy with that.

4. Not knowing what to wear because you have too many nice things.

5. Sometimes finding a shirt with the tag still on that you completely forgot about.

6. Never logging into your ING app because, uh, reality? No, thank you.

7. Never adding up what you spend on clothes each month. Never.

8. Sometimes becoming obsessive when something seems to be sold out. Searching, googling, looking, and ha, found your size: order immediately. It feels like a successful mission. A complete project. A deadline met.

9. It works the same way with ‘the online cart’. You find something ‘just nice’, but not super nice and put it in your cart. You look at it a few days later. Panic. Your item sold out. Damn it. Now you really want that blouse. Brings you to #8.

10. Also spending 89 euros at Etos while you only needed dry shampoo.

11. Sometimes forcing yourself to not buy anything for a month and managing to hold on for six days with pain and effort and justifying it with ‘YOLO’ or ‘I deserve it, I've worked hard this week’, ‘I'm so good on a diet’, ‘it's raining’, ‘it's only twenty euros’, ‘I've had such a tough year, there are worse things than shopping a lot, right?’.

12. Finding something boring after just one wear.

13. Not finding 250 euros for a fantastic birthday dress a lot of money.

14. Not only being able to score clothes for yourself but also finding a wardrobe for your husband, children, friends without all those shopping apps, the dog… Everything for the bathroom, the living room, for your bed: just let me.

15. Sometimes feeling ashamed because you know you actually have enough, but then in bed just opening that Zara app again. Just scrolling. Just looking at the new items. Oh, that turtleneck is also available in color number seven. Alright…

It's a disaster.