Honestly: what is NOT fun about being a mother of twins

Being a mother is by far the most special thing I have experienced in my life so far. Many other moms will agree with me.

Because explaining to someone without children how this feels is almost impossible. It’s a kind of intense love that you cannot comprehend. You look at the smile of your baby, toddler, or child and you literally melt away. When your little one has a moment of pain because they bump their head, you feel your stomach turn, you get a shock over you that you have never known. You would rather bump your head five thousand times to spare your little one that pain. You get a primal instinct as a mother that is so strong that you are amazed at yourself: you want to raise your little one safely and with a lot of love.. And that, exactly that, is all that matters. That’s what you go through fire for.

Now that I have been a mom for five months and belong to the intimate club of mothers who always say they don’t post baby spam on social media but then do it anyway, I do notice something remarkable. And that is because I am the mother of twins. Two boys. My boys, my #alles, yes sorry, I just can’t make it less cheesy because I am in love, you remember? But the reactions to twins are anything but positive. And that makes me sad.

I noticed it already in my pregnancy.. ‘Oh, what a beautiful round belly (twenty kilos of pure weight, wow)!’ ‘Yes, haha, there are two!’ I would proudly say. ‘Oh god, wow, that’s going to be busy.’ And that still happens now, and to make it even more complete: ‘Two boys? Wow, that seems really heavy! What a fuss that will be when they are older.’ This is how it goes every time I talk to someone. A neighbor on the street, a good friend, a former colleague, or even the window cleaner of my parents: everyone says or at least thinks the same. ‘What a hassle, a twin.’ And I also notice their feelings about twins: ‘Glad I didn’t have to deal with that.’ As if it’s a punishment to become a mother of two children at once. As if you have had terrible luck. I find it difficult because I always feel like I have to defend my two little guys. That’s why I always just respond: ‘Oh, well, it’s not that bad, how busy, it’s especially double the fun at home.’ I literally do that multiple times every day. But by now, I’m a bit tired of it.

That’s why I’m taking a moment for this ode to all mothers. Whether you have one baby or a whole bunch of babies: it can be a tough day sometimes. A night of heavy lifting. Tiredness is different from what you have ever known until now. You sometimes feel desperate when the crying just won’t stop, when poop is on your favorite dress, and when your laundry basket is overflowing with misery. We all have that. And it sometimes goes a bit rougher for everyone, even for the most beautiful Instagram moms, really. Let’s be a bit kinder to each other for this reason. Support each other a little instead of criticizing or talking negatively about someone’s family..

So I am responding one more time to all the comments about having two little boys. Yes, two babies of five months is busy, but I do it every day with all the love I have in me. Because they are my children. And nothing can compare to that, even if I don’t sleep again until 2025.