Your partner on vacation: the first time alone at home with children

‘I think I have never been this tired,’ I texted my mother and mother-in-law. I had been solo for three nights and I felt it.

Being home alone for the first time with twins: it’s quite exciting. My husband had planned a trip with friends ages ago, and that should be fine every now and then. But yes, then that day finally arrives. He’s on the plane ordering beer while you’re upstairs with two screaming children . With pacifiers and cuddly toys and mobiles and spinning dinosaurs, you do your best, but you can only pick up one child at a time, and that gets quite tricky when two pairs of hungry eyes are looking your way.

Of course, help was offered from all corners, and soon the house was filled with mothers, sisters, and friends. But yes, that’s still different from having your husband himself. You don’t have to tell him anything; he just does it. Now, it just so happens that my little boy Daaf has a bit of a leap. He no longer sleeps after half past three and he finds that quite nice. Really a super nice leap. That sounds incredibly motherly and condescending, that leap, but it is true. I can’t give any other explanation for his babbling and squeaking all night long. Yes, once you danced all night long, now you give milk all night long. How life changes, oh.

But still, today at work, after 0.2 hours of sleep, I asked a colleague with three children: how do you do this? I can barely take care of two children on my own. I counted down the hours until my husband was back, and that had mainly a practical reason. I needed him. Not so much in the sense of love, more in the sense of fatherhood. I realized during those days he was away how much I actually need him every day and how nice it is to be parents together of two non-sleeping rascals. How lonely it is to do everything alone. To see a smile between the two brothers by yourself and to melt from it alone. To see a first crawling attempt by yourself. So boring. And that’s the beauty of these three solo nights: you appreciate the other again. Because the other can also get up at half past three to warm up a bottle. You can moan together in the night and melt together with happiness when you look at your happy children.

Yes, the first time a few days alone with children: I have never been this tired, but I have also never been this happy with my husband, who turns out to be a very good father.