6 myths about cheating

I wish that nauseating feeling of discovering that your partner has cheated on you on very few people in life. So much goes through your mind and you have no idea how to deal with all those emotions. Naturally, it's logical, because you are left with all sorts of questions that you have to fill in yourself. Is it my fault? Was the relationship not good enough? Is everyone like this? That's why I have listed the myths about cheating.

1. You can prevent it as a partner
If you have been cheated on in your previous relationship(s), then the chances are high that you have developed quite a few trust issues by now. As a result, you probably have the urge to occasionally go through someone else's phone, especially if you are not yet sure whether you trust your partner 100 percent. By checking, you hope to ‘prevent’ cheating and stop it. Now I can already tell you that this is not the solution to success. If your partner wants to cheat, they will do it anyway; you simply do not have control over that, no matter how much you might want to.

2. It's your fault
When your partner cheats, it's human to become insecure and look for the problem within yourself. You start to wonder if you were good enough for that person and especially what you could have done to prevent it, but you shouldn't think like that. Suppose your partner didn't like you as a person at all, then your relationship would have ended long ago. Cheaters just get a kick out of it and often see it as a kind of challenge to feed their ego.

3. ‘Once a cheater always a cheater’
Now I must admit that this statement is often quite accurate. People who cheat and then feel little remorse will most likely continue to do so. However, there are sometimes exceptions. Some can feel so much remorse that they blame themselves for the rest of their lives, or even go into therapy for it. I might just give them the benefit of the doubt.

4. You only cheat through sex
Cheating is not just about sex. If your partner is secretly having deep conversations with someone else at night, I can hardly imagine that you wouldn't find this extremely disrespectful as a partner. For some, this is even worse than actually committing the act because you are cheating on an emotional level, and I can agree with that.

5. Blaming the other person
This is always such a weak excuse because your partner is certainly mature enough to make their own choices. The excuse ‘that other person kept messaging me’ or ‘that other person started kissing’ is the biggest nonsense ever. If you found it annoying, you could have pushed that person away or ignored them; it's that simple. Except, of course, if there was a case of rape or drugging, then it's a completely different story.

6. The ‘other’ is bad
It's completely logical that you have a strong dislike for the person your partner cheated with; you sometimes have every right to. If you know for sure that the other person was aware of your relationship, then they are certainly not innocent. But maybe your partner made that person believe that he or she was single; who knows. The problem always lies with your partner because they were supposed to remain loyal to you. Choose your battles, otherwise, you only make it more exhausting for yourself.

Source: psychologytoday.com | Image: Netflix