Sexual desire
That people are different is of course no news, but we sometimes seem to forget that we all look at sex differently. Some people feel like it every day while others enjoy having sex a few times a month. It is often said that men are more likely to want sex and that at the beginning of a relationship, you can't keep your hands off each other. What are these ideas actually based on and is there any truth to them? LotteLust looked into it for you.
Sexual desire or libido?
Sexual desire is a complex phenomenon influenced by various factors, including hormones, stress, relationships, and emotions. Ellen Laan, the now-deceased sexologist, believed that we should no longer use the word libido. According to Laan, sexual desire is not as simple as an overall libido level, as sexual desire can vary. It is not the case that some people simply have a higher libido than others. To a greater or lesser extent, almost everyone has sexual desires. Those desires can be ignited or dampened, for example, if you are going through a stressful period in your life.
Why some people have more sexual desire
There are various factors that contribute to a high sexual desire. Hormones play an important role in determining our sexual desire. Men naturally have more testosterone, which can increase sexual desire. Women also have testosterone, but in much lower concentrations. Other hormones such as estrogen, progesterone, and prolactin can also influence sexual desire.
In addition to hormones, there are also psychological factors that can increase sexual desire. It seems that when we are very much in love, we want more sex with our partner. This is often referred to as the honeymoon phase . People who have had many positive sexual experiences will want more sex. You can compare it to food. If you have only tasted overcooked vegetables, you might think you don't like vegetables, but if you are served well-prepared vegetables with a nice sauce, you might want another delicious plate of vegetables tomorrow. It works the same way with sex: if you have often had sex that you didn't enjoy, it's logical that you are not eager to jump back into bed with a partner.
Less sexual desire
If you have a decreased sexual desire, it can have various causes. Stress is a common cause, but psychological issues such as anxiety and depression have a very negative impact on your sexual desires. Additionally, medications such as antidepressants and birth control pills can have a negative effect.
What also doesn't help is insecurity. People who are insecure about their bodies or have a low self-esteem may be less inclined to want sex. Relationship problems can also reduce sexual desire. You are not obligated to have sex with your partner, but it can cause friction if one of you has a much lower need for sex. In this article find tips for when you want more sex than your partner.
Tips to increase your sexual desire
If you want to increase your sexual desire, there are several things you can try:
1. Improve communication in your relationship. By talking openly and honestly about your sexual desires and needs, you can better understand your partner and the sexual tension between you can increase.
2. Work on reducing stress in your life. Yoga, meditation, and mindfulness exercises can help reduce stress and make you feel more relaxed.
3. Experiment with new experiences. Try new things in the bedroom, such as toys or different positions, to increase excitement.
4. Aphrodisiacs, or lust stimulants. And no, we are not talking about Viagra. There are various products you can consume to stimulate desire, such as oysters. You can read about it in this article.
