The signal that you are taken for granted by your environment

It can be a difficult consideration: when do you know if people truly appreciate you or if they simply take you for granted? Especially when it can be part of your personality to always do a lot for others, such feelings can make you quite insecure. How can you be sure that your environment really values what you do for them or that they simply take it for granted?

If you doubt this, psychologists say you should do one thing that is actually quite obvious: bring it up with that person. And the response would, according to those same psychologists, be your answer. Not in words, but in the way they react.

Because people can say that you don’t need to worry about anything, but actions show something different. When you bring up that you don’t feel seen enough, for example, and you get a response that this is not the case but that person then checks out of the conversation, it’s wise to think carefully about whether you still want this friendship.

Because when you express your concerns and they are ignored or brushed off, that is the signal that you are indeed being taken for granted. That person assumes that you will just keep hanging around and won’t go anywhere, regardless of how you are treated.

Another red flag is when you receive an irritated response, as if you are being dramatic. In this case, always stay true to your own feelings, because otherwise people will continue to cross your boundaries. Learn to say ‘no’ well, for example.

PsychologyToday puts this very nicely: you cannot force anyone to make you a priority; that person must choose to do so themselves. And when they don’t, it might be up to you to end the friendship.

Source: PsychologyToday