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Female narcissist: this is how high the percentage is

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Vrouw met lange, golvende haren in een zakelijke jas lacht zelfverzekerd, symbolisch voor vrouwelijk narcisme.
Often when we think about narcissism, we associate it more with men, at least I do. I think of that mega dominant, arrogant man who feels superior to others. But don't be mistaken, female narcissists certainly exist too. And they can be just as destructive, but women are actually more subtle. For me, a reason to dive into this, how many female narcissists are there actually? We often write about narcissism. Partly because there is so much talk about it that it has almost become a buzzword. Because, mainly when a relationship is broken, you usually hear: oh he is really a narcissist.

What is narcissism?

Narcissism is a personality disorder that primarily manifests as an excessive need for admiration, a lack of empathy, and displays a lot of manipulative behavior. Male narcissists often exhibit openly arrogant and dominant traits, while female narcissists can express their narcissistic traits in a much more subtle way. This is why we don't often think of narcissism in women. They disguise it in a much more natural way.

narcissist angry not used

The official figures

I looked into it for a moment. But according to official estimates, 6% of the world's population has a narcissistic personality disorder. This percentage comes from studies based on people seeking help in mental health care. However, the actual numbers are likely much higher, as narcissists rarely seek diagnosis and often do not seek help. Dr. Ramani Durvasula (a renowned psychologist, author, and expert in the field of narcissism) estimates that the actual percentage lies between 10% and 15% when we also count people with strong narcissistic traits without a formal diagnosis.

Why don't we know exactly how many people are narcissistic?

There are quite a few different factors that make it really difficult to give an exact number. Here it comes

  • Little self-insight among narcissists: Many narcissists do not seek help because they see themselves as perfect. Oops. Yes, clear.
  • Focus on extreme cases: The DSM-5 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, fifth edition, is a handbook used by health professionals to diagnose mental disorders.) defines narcissism as a disorder only when the behavior is extreme and destructive, which excludes people with less extreme narcissistic traits. So the numbers are really just the tip of the iceberg.
  • Subtle and hidden narcissists: Female narcissists often use very subtle manipulation, which is harder to recognize.
  • Cultural differences: What is experienced as narcissistic also varies by culture, which affects the interpretation of narcissistic behavior.

Are there more narcissists than we think?

Given all these factors, it is very possible that the actual percentage of narcissists is much higher than the often cited 6%. If we look not only at people who are officially diagnosed but also at those with sstrong narcissistic traits (without formal diagnosis), experts estimate that this percentage could rise to as much as 10% or 15% of the population. So you see, it is really important to recognize narcissistic behavior, even if someone does not have an official diagnosis.

Male and female narcissists: this is the distribution

According to official figures, 7.7% of men and 4.8% of women have a narcissistic personality disorder. Okay, this suggests that the distribution is approximately 60% male and 40% female narcissists.

Why female narcissists are more subtle

Female narcissists often use emotional manipulation and subtle forms of control, such as gaslighting and inducing guilt. This allows them to remain unnoticed for much longer than male narcissists, who are often openly dominant and aggressive. Additionally, social norms surrounding the behavior of men and women play a role, causing female narcissists to be seen as less problematic.

Conclusion

Although the official figures suggest that narcissism is more common in men, it is likely that female narcissists are undervalued in the statistics. The actual number of narcissists is likely higher than the 6% that is often mentioned, especially if we include people with somewhat less extreme narcissistic traits. It is essential to recognize narcissistic behavior, even if someone does not have an official diagnosis, as this behavior can have a significant impact on a person's environment.

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