This is how you know if you argue too much in your relationship

Small or big arguments, about important or unimportant things; it actually just comes with having a relationship. There are very few couples who do not argue with each other, and to be honest, that seems very strange to me. A little irritation can even be healthy: it keeps things sharp and ultimately helps you grow together in your relationship.

Arguing from time to time is therefore completely normal and can even have a positive effect on your relationship. But how do you know if you are arguing too much in your relationship? When does it become an unhealthy situation for you and your partner?

It is important to check whether you are arguing more than there are fun moments in your relationship. Can you still laugh together? Is there room for coziness? If you are constantly clashing over the smallest things, you probably also realize that something needs to change. It may also be that there is a logical explanation for the negative situation. For example, if one of you has been feeling down for a longer period, such as due to burnout, or is dealing with significant stress for other reasons.

If arguments are not resolved, you can be affected by them for a long time. For example, you might start sleeping stressed, which leads to an increased heart rate and thus a disturbed sleep. In the long term, this can have greater negative consequences for your health. Talking it out is therefore inevitable, because poor sleep only worsens the tension between you. Therefore, try to accept that your opinions differ or that a certain trait simply belongs to your loved one. Don't keep having the same discussion, because you know how it will end.

There are also situations where you should not try to talk it out or solve it by patiently waiting for the stressful period to pass. This is the case with arguments that are violent. This can be in the area of psychological abuse (think of gaslighting) or physical violence.

But in the case of normal arguments, which occur every now and then, I have learned that it is best to get over your anger for a moment, try to look at it from the other side, and never go to sleep without saying ‘good night’ to each other.