This is how you survive the airport
I have quite a love-hate relationship with Schiphol. Because on the one hand, it is the beginning of a trip and trips are always fun. But on the other hand, you are plagued for hours by annoying overzealous customs officers who see your creams and perfumes as life-threatening BOMBS, long lines with panicking Japanese, and of course the ever-present fear that you will keep beeping when you have to walk through the customs gate and then have to strip down to your underwear. And then you assume that you have no delays because if that is the case, you are completely done. Soon a date with Schiphol on the agenda? Then memorize the following and bon voyage!
Easy clothing
And that's very important. No nice maxi skirt, wedges, a neck full of necklaces, a wrist full of bracelets, and a nice hat; those are all things that customs officers think they see BOMBS in. Simple pants, flat shoes with a not too thick sole (definitely no heels, flying in heels is so not chic), minimal jewelry, and if it’s not necessary, don’t wear a belt either because that also has to come off.
Large bag
I adore my PS11 from Proenza Schouler and together we have had a very wild flying adventure, but there simply isn't enough space to carry all the stuff you need at airports. Especially if you also plan to do a bit of tax-free shopping because then you end up with 17 plastic bags and that’s not fun for anyone. I take my red Stella McCartney with me, it fits everything from laptop to magazines and back again.
Technology
Don't be the person who brings a laptop full of movies but then forgets to charge that laptop. All the devices you take with you should be neatly plugged in the night before departure.
And then you arrive at Schiphol (or any airport). For this part, I called a friend of mine who flies so much (24 hours to Shanghai for a meeting, that kind of work) that I called him the U.F.O. for a while: Unidentified Flying Object. He talks about “optimizing maximum customs efficiency” and everything is about getting from front door to gate to seat as quickly as possible.
Choose your line
When you are in line for the security check, you always choose the wrong line. That's just how it is. In any case, pay attention to the following things: avoid families, parents have to help their children and children never listen and run away and keep beeping, ergo, it takes a long time. Instead, choose the line where most businessmen or businesswomen are. They travel a lot and often and will cause the least delay. Also, pay attention to the clothing of the people in line. Hysterical women in richly dressed outfits: not a smart move, because all those nice accessories have to come off and therefore, it also takes a long time.
Customs
In the Netherlands, you can choose which line to stand in at passport control. Scan the officials and choose the one with the most stripes on his jacket. The more stripes, the higher the rank, the more experienced he is, and thus the faster he does his job. In Germany, they have stars instead of stripes, and in New York, you're out of luck; someone assigns you a line.
Passport vs ID card
In Europe, you can travel with your ID card, and that is highly recommended. The thing is small and fits in your wallet, so you can grab it quickly. If you have a new passport, you can, if the airport supports that technology, be checked electronically. You only need to hold your passport for a scan and can then walk straight through.
Suitcase
The U.F.O. rarely checks a suitcase in and only if it really can't be helped (if you are going to NYFW for example, really no way I can fit those 12 pairs of heels in a carry-on suitcase) do you check your suitcase in. The rule is that when you have a direct flight, your suitcase will be the first on the belt when you check it in as late as possible.
Your ticket
Of course, you checked in at home, printed your boarding pass, or have it in digital form on your phone. Many airlines have an app where your ticket looks like a QR code, so no more hassle with large paper tickets.
Be friendly
To everyone. Do you have to check in somewhere? Then try the business class or fast track line; with a bit of luck, they will help you if you blink your eyes a few times, and in the worst case, you have to move to the ‘regular’ line, but then you are still nicely at the front.
