HAVE YOU ALREADY HEARD OF THIS PHENOMENON?

As you may know I can get completely lost in Reddit topics, where thousands of people from all over the world discuss, share tips, ask for advice, or whatever a forum can be used for. Recently, I came across a topic that was about “the morning text”, and whether The Woman likes it or finds it a bit creepy and too pushy. Morning text? Que? I'm familiar with phenomena like morning sex, morning after pill, morning shame and morning breath, but the morning text was new to me.

In short, a morning text is a message in the morning (yes DUH), sent by a man with whom you had a date the night before. Or a man with whom you had a date recently. The morning text arrives on weekdays between 07:00 and 10:00, after which it is no longer a morning text, and wishes you a good morning and asks if you slept well. It goes something like this: “Hey you, slept well? Good morning! Looking forward to today?” Or something.

The idea is that the man in question thinks of you first thing in the day and shows that through a message. Aah sweet OMG so many hearts! In a time when everything is digital, every digital sign of life is important, so when it turns out that he thinks of you right after waking up and immediately sends you a message, it is A Sign. At least, that’s how the internet presents it.

I don't know. With a former love, I indeed sent a morning text every morning we didn't wake up next to each other. In fact, if that message didn't come, I knew something was wrong. If we went to bed arguing the night before, no message the next morning, I was anxious all day. He always got up earlier than I did, so when I woke up, I immediately reached for my phone to read his message. If it wasn't there, I didn't understand much of it.

That was quite dysfunctional. With another love, it was all much less forced, we texted each other when we had something to say, and sometimes that was only at 14:00. And that feels a lot more relaxed.

But look, it is of course very romantic if you are occasionally woken up by a loving message from someone who gives you butterflies. Just something short, something sweet, something like I-think-of-you-hey-bye. Not too exaggerated, not too hysterical, not too clingy. Further searching for this topic, I actually came across several sites that offer examples of morning texts and there are some really cringeworthy texts among them. Can I share a few? Just promise me that you will never ever use them in real life and promise me right away that when someone uses them on YOU, you will immediately kick that guy to the curb.

“I am sending you this message not just to say good morning but also to put a big smile on your face.”

“Even though it takes a heartbeat to think about you, the smile that follows lasts the entire day. Good morning!”

“I hate waking up because then I can’t dream of you. Good morning.”

“You are the star twinkles in my sky and the sunshine that brightens my life.”

“You’re the ocean and I’m the beach. We belong together. Good morning my love.”

“The first thing I do is text you, since you are the only sunshine in my life. Good morning.”

“Every breath you take, I’ll be thinking of you. You are the sugar in my life.”

OMG SO MUCH VOMIT. If you can handle reading more of this kind of crap, this is where you need to be.