Fun & Famous

Mansion Global:

THE ULTIMATE HOUSE PORN

You know, my heart races dangerously fast at extremely expensive houses. Probably because I live in a fairly small rickety house that can be positively described as ‘characteristic’ and ‘authentic’, but can also very well be classified as a ‘chicken coop’. It's lovely living there, don't get me wrong, but man, how I would love to live in a gigantic palace with high walls, enormous windows, and seas of space. Until that time comes, I keep myself busy with the palaces of others, and thanks to May-Britt, I now know the ultimate site to get my fix.

Because she sent me Mansion Global . This site showcases the most beautiful houses and apartments. Or rather, they are displayed; it’s not a real estate agent. They say the following about themselves: “Mansion Global is a premier digital destination connecting the world’s affluent real estate buyers with prestige properties across the globe through relevant, timely listings and compelling content.” But what that means? No idea, and honestly, I don't care at all.

What it comes down to is this: a lot of expensive houses with a lot of beautiful photos. And the prices are listed as well. For example, there is in New York a lovely little thing by Central Park, with 4 bedrooms, 4.5 bathrooms (a half bathroom? How does that work?!) and a pretty nice view. How much does that cost? Oh, you should think of a tidy $68.950.000,-. And no, I didn't write one zero too many. A small SEVENTY MILLION DOLLARS for four bedrooms. If you make a down payment of 20%, pay it off over 30 years at 4% interest, you have a monthly mortgage of $320.800,61. Just a fairly spacious apartment in Amsterdam. Per month. Totally insane. Totally wonderful.

Or a penthouse on top of the Baccarat Hotel. 5 bedrooms, 5.5 bathrooms: 60 million dollars. Haha, it’s just almost laughable how expensive it is. Just imagine having so much money that you can afford such things. And then you also have to maintain it, clean it, buy a shitload of furniture, really. It never ends.

So are you bored at work? No worries, Mansion Global is the ideal way to drag yourself through the day while drooling over your keyboard. And if your boss starts complaining, just say that this is a way to keep yourself super duper motivated, because if you work hard enough, you too can someday afford such a house. Uh, well, sort of.