Happy & Healthy
It is important to be careful with the wool shaver
I would like to warn everyone about the wool shaver. For those who are currently experiencing an error: it is a device to shave the pills off your sweater. But you have to be careful with it, boy. Let me tell you how I know this.
About three months ago, I bought a couple of stunningly beautiful sweaters: a classic sweater with an ultra-cool polar bear from Max Mara, a hippie-esque piece from Paul & Joe Sister, and a black low-cut pullover from Designers Remix. (By the way, here you can read why it's so nice to buy designer stuff) In the first weeks, I was of course completely in bliss. They looked beautiful and chic, they were warm and comfortable, and they stayed beautiful. But that was three months ago. Because last week, to my dismay, I saw that all my treasures had suddenly become horrendous with pills.
However, I am not easily caught off guard. So I resolutely grabbed my lint roller, laid the three affected sweaters on the bed, and rolled and rolled and rolled and rolled. After ten minutes of active rolling, I examined the harvest. There were maybe five pills on the lint roller, and my sweaters still had three hundred thousand on them. What now? Just pluck all those little pills off myself then. After ten minutes of plucking, however, I still saw very little result, and therefore I eventually went to my tailor. He, after hearing my pill problem, enthusiastically started waving a device that was completely unfamiliar to me until then: the wool shaver. ‘Very good, very handy for pills on sweater!’
”At home, I enthusiastically started shaving, and it was an immediate success.”
At home, I enthusiastically started shaving, and it was an immediate success. How fast it went. How well it worked. And how addictive it was. The compartment where the pills were collected filled up in no time, and – this may sound a bit sickly – how I enjoyed seeing such a full compartment. And so I kept shaving. I shaved and shaved and shaved until the very last pill was gone. And when all the pills were gone, I took the shaver over all the sweaters one last time. Just to finish it off.
Also want to clear out your closet? This is how you do it.
Satisfied, I hung the sweaters back on their hangers. Proudly, I looked at them from a distance. They looked beautiful again. Ha! So that was the secret of all those women without pilling sweaters. But just as I was about to walk out of the room, I suddenly realized something. The sweaters felt different. Thinner. Fluttery. Or however you say that. The sweater with the polar bear even seemed slightly translucent all of a sudden. At first, I thought: this can't be true, this is just some kind of delusion. But after ten minutes of staring and feeling, I knew: this is the worst fashion day of my life. I have shaved three fantastic sweaters to pieces.
After a period of deep mourning, I gained insight. Because I want something good to come out of this debacle, I have decided that from now on it is my task to warn about the dangers of the wool shaver. And that is why I say: enjoy. But shave in moderation.
