Fun & Famous

THE STRANGEST THING YOU HEARD THIS WEEK

The foot injection

I am living this week in the delightful split between half camping (well, I’m in a beach house with all amenities, but for a spoiled brat like me, that’s equivalent to a nudist campsite, showering with coins and walking around with toilet rolls under your arm) and the most luxurious lives of the New York upper class. I am completely immersed in the book ‘Primates of Park Avenue’ where author Wednesday Martin describes ‘the kind’ of mothers who live in and around Park Avenue.

Which bag you should carry for example (like the Luggage Bag, the Nano Luggage Bag or the Trapeze Bag from Céline, the large Boy Bag from Chanel, the Evelyn, the small Jypsière or the Kelly crossbody from Hermès or of course the Birkin of 30 or 35 centimeters) and where you should work out (the cool types do SoulCycling, the more prim types go to Physique 57 where they take their ballet beautiful classes).

”No problem at all, said the seller. We have a solution for that”

I knew all this from my own fieldwork during fashion weeks. Until I reached page 158 where the main character discovers a tear in her heel from the perfect shoe she would wear to a ‘girls night in’ organized by a powerful billionaire named Rebecca. Panic, then. We understand.

So she sprints to Barneys to pick out another shoe. They are definitely there, but the twelve centimeter high Louboutins (which were on sale and screamed her name) pinched so much at her left toe that she would never last the whole girls night in.

No problem at all, said the seller. We have a solution for that. He could give her a list of chiropodists who would give you a numbing, local injection so you could bounce around in your Loubies all night. Really, fashion before comfort is so passé, in New York they even make twelve centimeter high heels feel like sneakers. I am stunned. And fascinated. Because secretly I am very curious if this injection will also take root here. Because I have to find it all exaggerated/stupid and ridiculous, but if I’m very honest, I crave such an injection three times a week. At least. What about you?