10 SIGNS THAT YOU ARE GROWN UP

“Later when I grow up or as grown-ups say, adult, then…” And there I, as a twelve-year-old toddler, unfolded a particularly adventurous life. I would live by the coast in Verweggistan, have a top job in communications, and a sun-kissed partner. Now I live by the Vecht (also water, but little coast), in a quintessentially Dutch place, I have no job in communications, and actually, only my partner is sun-kissed. But there are other things by which you can measure that you are ‘grown up’. And those are a lot less sexy than I used to think.

You have enough money left over to do groceries. Yes, it's that simple. You no longer have to live on cheese crumbs and crackers after you've danced wildly on the bar one night. The calculator stays off when you maneuver between the supermarket aisles and you don't gasp for air when the register beeps an amount beyond the limit on your bank account. Because balance, right?.

 
You cook at least three times a week (or at least make an attempt). There are vegetables in the plastic drawer of your fridge. With a bit of luck, you can whip up a dish from all those ingredients. All very balanced.

 
You think. So you go to bed early when you have to meet the chief at the table the next day, instead of showing up with a wine haze. You have brainwaves about career moves and whether you are happy with your daily routine.

 
You have real friends. Not an endless circle of acquaintances who leave you stranded at a station in the middle of the night when you've missed the train. But friends who help you, with whom you can talk and who give you unsolicited (that should be unasked for, of course) advice.

You become the 2.0, 3.0, and 4.0 version of yourself. You read adult books that you learn something from, not silly novels. Now and then, you spend an evening at the theater for a cultural spectacle. You no longer just rock at concerts, but also appreciate subdued music (what the hell, maybe even a classical piece). And as a result, you develop that brain and elevate it to great heights. Or just a level up in the air, that's fine too.

You have a roof over your head. Something of your own, without having to share the loo with at least two buddies and having to wait in line for the shower. A potential cohabitant takes care of the house just as much as you do, instead of swinging half the meal over the edge while wokking and leaving it to rot there. At least, I hope so for you.

You are genuinely interested in someone. The skill to listen to someone has been tapped, so you finally know what the rest of the world is up to. Instead of shouting at someone in a shady café without catching a single response.

Your backpack has some weight. Along the way, you filled it with break-ups, sometimes a disappointment, or some wisdom. Yes, it’s heavier, but you also stand a lot sturdier in the world because of it.

You have one or two wrinkles.

Or well, I do. That's why it seems fair to me that you have them too.