Kiki’s Temptation Island VIP Brabbels
From now on it’s ‘Game over’. Right, Ruud? Everyone feels like doing naughty things. Everyone has an itch in their groin. We’re not taking those agreements so seriously anymore. One firework less or more, what does it matter? It’s already New Year’s Eve. I was sitting behind my laptop with a big smile during this episode. (campfire, campfire!) Disaster tourism purebred, no shame in the game. Let’s go.
1. Ooooooh that preview where Rosanna falls, I JUST CAN’T. Control yourself, Kiek. Control yourself not to. Skip. To. That. Piece.
2. So Kelly secretly snuck into Zwanetta’s room at night to steal her ’cool ghetto words‘ booklet. Come on, practice the pronunciation a bit more, Kel. ’I really had kaolo (pronounced ‘kauwlóó‘) fun with you guys. Honestly. Kaaaaaaaulo fun. Cheers man. Super G.’
3. Meanwhile, Niels is emerging as the new Tim. ‘I’m really so, so, so crazy about you. You’re so beautiful and fun and sweet and handsome and beautiful. Where are you sleeping tonight? With me, right? You’re not going to embarrass me in front of the cameras, are you? If you don’t get into that bed right now, I don’t know if your family will sleep well tonight. You don’t want that, do you, sweetheart?’
4. Oh yes. Shit is happening. Alex is lying in Roos’s bed to manipulate images. What a little rat, hahaha. Roos is losing it. ‘Why is he lying next to me? Why is he FUCKING lying next to me?!’ Rosanna’s. Personality disorder. Pops. Up. Starts. Error. In. Upper room. Lip filler explosion danger. Must. Throw. Stuff.
5. HAHAHAHAHAH LET ME FEEL IF SHE CAN’T KNOCK OVER THAT PLANTER I’M GOING TO DIE. Can someone please make a GIF of that and send it to me? Sounds delightful.
6. The next morning, Alex of course acts like he has no idea what happened last night. ‘Don’t be so childish, come on. We’re adults, right?‘ And then solving problems with a high five, dude? Special.
7. Even though Twitter isn’t really participating this season, a gem pops up here and there. ‘What has Niels done with his hair anyway? It looks like it’s completely burned on top.’ (trying to suppress laughter)
8. Do you think Ruud can last one episode without talking about his dop, nonsense, dick, 7 crows, child’s arm, tampeloeres, and hairy coconuts that are about to burst? I still need to have breakfast, people. Thank you. #BangForMenWithBlueBalls.
9. Nice man. Time for some quartet fun during the group date.
In the left corner we have for you:
– Ruud & Kelly (if you walk down the street with this one, everyone turns their neck. ‘This one’. Romantic.)
– Stefano and Zwanetta (‘Now that little swan has come this way, I’m having a hard time…’)
– Niels and Fabiola (‘There’s sex in the air… Sex is in the aiir…’)
– Don and Daan (the only two people I kind of wish would fool around with each other. Honestly. You too.)
In the right corner we present the ladies:
– Rowena with Karim (on the boat: (‘Come here Karim. Yes here. Next to me. Good. Sit. Down. Good boy!’)
– Roos with Alex (‘Yeah, he does cheer me up.’) CHICK, you smashed the entire pool table yesterday?! How?
– Gelina chooses Jay (the big question, will he also enter her aura? Who else is afraid that Gelina will have a heart attack this season?)
– Amijé and Thies (the better-looking version of Donny, yes. I’m still trying to figure out from which angle exactly…)
10. Smart move by the creators, huh, those wheelbarrow games on the beach. The butt battle. And then that boat sailing along the coast, ooooh. What a mindfuck. And then that poor Rowena in the sea. Give that woman a minute with her crows, man!
11. Mindfuck 2.0. The voice-over that wonderfully uses the moment. ‘Donny doesn’t know how to handle the whole situation and walks away…’ Dark voice slowly continues: ‘…for a possible reunion with Amijé. How do you make women cry? Like this.
12. Niels keeps rambling on about his perfect match with Fab.
I get it. They have similarities. Two even! Brain content of a rainworm + something with a hair situation.
13. ‘If you want to be a pussy, stay a nice pussy. I don’t need any pussies.’ You just gotta love Rowena’s tile wisdoms. Meanwhile, Ruud is kindly asked to take a one-way trip to the seabed.
14. Oh oh, sneaky creators. They’re messing with things by making Amijé think that Donny is holding hands with Danique for fun. He is of course. But that photoshoot is so delightful to hide behind. Right, Don?
15. Hahaha, how Rosanna imitates that little laugh of Fabiola. Love it.
16. The sneaky campfire images of the men stir up a lot with the ladies.
Rosanna: ‘Well, easy. That makes a lot clear for me then. That I’m going to Alex more than I thought.’ Goodness, how those creators must have been high-fiving each other that night. Can’t be otherwise.
17. And just when you think you’ve seen it all, Niels also goes to bathe with Fab in the shower. ‘Why not. That shower is super big. It’s really made for that.’ All shame gone, that crazy guy.
18. What are we raffling off this week? The Rosanna-proof dinner set worth 289.95 euros, the spiritual workshop ‘learning to see auras’ with Gelien AND the Fanta/cola T-shirt from Donny’s merchandise line. You don’t want to miss this.
P.S.: Test. Heart at the bottom if you go to my Insta Stories @kikiduren to see Roos slide down those gigantic poles by the pool one more time. MOEHAAAA.
P.P.S.: If you’re already feeling jolly this morning, I also ask you to watch the Temptation Farts YouTube to die laughing.
P.P.P.S. Oh yes oh yes oh yes, I was in bed with Rowena and asked her a bit too much alcohol-induced hysterical questions about her sex life. (And those 7 crows of Ruud.) You check that video here.
