Why you should be happy when your relationship is in a rut

No one dreams of evenings filled with Netflix, with your love in sweatpants next to you on the couch, spilling mayonnaise on your white bathrobe and with a bedtime of ten o'clock.

We all want to make distant trips, receive exotic love declarations, feel adrenaline coursing through our bodies, wake up every morning to a laundry list of surprises, spontaneous moments, fireworks, and if possible, five times sex in a row. We always want to be on the go, meet trendy people, visit cool places, and be at hotspots where mayonnaise comes from golden tubes and where bedtimes do not exist. At least, that's what we think. Because actually, we want routine. Super routine. In our relation and actually also in our entire life.

Here's the thing. From our weekdays, 40% is the same every day. As in: you get up, go to work, cook, eat, scroll on your phone, watch television, and go back to bed. Something like that. We obviously do this ourselves, because what you want to do on an ordinary Tuesday, you decide for yourself. You can also plan surprises on Tuesday. Ha. That's where the catch is. Because we can seek out spectacle every week, but we don't, because we humans are creatures of habit. We love repetitions, order, and regularity. No matter how much we deny it and how much we look forward to that distant vacation. We do want to break that routine with a vacation or a weekend away, sure. But not too often. Most of the time, we want that rhythm of getting up, working, eating, and sleeping.

It's no coincidence that 85 percent of people who win millions in the lottery just keep working and keep their lives the same. That’s what we happy get from that daily life we often complain about. Even if you don't realize it. If you had all the money in the world in your bank account, of course, you would score a few Hermès bags to look at, but other than that… Your life remains the same. And you still just sit on the couch on Tuesday with your love, under a warm blanket with your glasses on and your tea in your lap. Because you enjoy it, that daily routine. And so does he. Happiness lies in an ordinary day.

So if you notice that every day looks like yesterday: lucky you.

FACTS

• There are 1.2 trillion photos posted on Instagram with the hashtag #love
• The most taken product for vacation is a toilet roll (50,8%)
• Approximately 34,000 divorces occur in the Netherlands each year