Amayzine

Filing a report during a pandemic

My identity was stolen on Instagram. A group of criminals saw the opportunity to impersonate me and started sending messages to my relatives. It's a good thing someone told me that I needed to report identity theft, otherwise I would probably have been happy with Instagram's quick action to take everything offline. But I did report it, and that process is a bit different than usual.

Through non-urgent police, I got a very nice woman on the line, who told me that I needed to go to the police station. I hadn't experienced anything this exciting in ages, so I was already looking forward to it. Until I was called to see if I wanted to, settle things via video call. Now I do nothing else these days, so a little video calling (what a cute word actually) with the National Police should work too. Friday evening at half past six, it was my turn. From now on, I will also never say again that civil servants stop working at four in the afternoon. Before I started video calling with the police officer in question, I received an instruction email. Handy, I thought. I had to test the speed of my connection, especially not to click on the same link twice, and to check in advance if the microphone and camera were working. Now I always open another program to see how I look on the video call, but the officers in question had tackled that. Finally, I received some points of attention, which I first had to chuckle at but a second later my vivid imagination ran wild.

The police asked me if I wanted to be decently dressed. Decently is a broad term. And a request to keep offensive objects out of view. Interference from bystanders was also not desired. Now I only have one bystander at home, who doesn't really feel the need to get involved in my report, but I can imagine how that could go. In my head, I already heard a whole family and in-laws in the background shouting details. Annoying, of course. But somewhere I realized that those first points are not asked for nothing.

Would someone really dare to appear in a bathrobe (or less) in front of the camera? To report something in between breakfast and showering (or worse)? And would you really leave obscene objects on nightstands if a uniformed police officer can look into your house? I even put on makeup out of nerves (even though I hadn't done anything wrong) for my conversation with the officer in question. You want to look like a good model citizen on screen; at least, I suddenly felt that need very strongly. It's a bit like having a police car behind you and not even driving too fast.

It was a pilot, so we have to wait and see if you can always report via video call in the future. I had the nicest, most understanding, and honest police officer from Hilversum and the surrounding area. It was actually just pleasant, aside from the identity theft. If you get to express your opinion online in the future, dress appropriately and put obscene objects in a drawer. Small effort, great pleasure. I think so. After all, you wouldn't go to a police station dressed indecently with an obscene object in hand. And call me if you plan to do that, then I'll come and watch.

Final message, even though you probably already know it: never give out phone numbers, be alert if someone suddenly creates a new account via social media, and DO. NOT. CLICK. ON. LINKS.