Is your boss a narcissist?

The number of narcissists among managers is overrepresented. Not so strange, as they are driven, have little empathy (they can make rigorous decisions without feeling bad about it), and they have a big ego which likely leads people to give them higher positions more quickly. The chance that you have or have had a narcissistic manager is therefore significant. I found the narcissism checklist for a manager extremely enlightening.

1. He/She ingratiates you
The narcissistic manager will first pull out all the stops to make you like him/her. A narcissist wants to be admired and is clever, so the way to make you look at him/her with desire is mainly by being charming and investing time in you. But be careful, this can change at any moment.

2. You are with the narcissist or against
A narcissistic boss can completely pull you into his/her camp and share everything with you, but if you ever treat him/her critically or disappoint him/her in any way, the chance is high that it will be over. For the narcissist, there is no middle ground: you are either a friend or an enemy, and nothing in between.

3. There is zero empathy
You ask if you can start an hour later because your boyfriend just broke up with you or you can't come because your child has to go to the hospital. The narcissist will have no understanding for that. Empathy is a word that does not fit in the narcissist's vocabulary.

4. Belittling and excluding people
I once had a manager who made a harsh joke, after which someone reminded him that there was also a woman, me, in the room. To which he replied: “A woman? I only see May-Britt, but I can't call that a woman.” And believe me, this was not meant as a joke. If I had had the checklist then, I would have comforted myself with the thought that the poor man just had a disorder. But pay attention, the narcissist loves to play a game of divide and conquer, will form groups, favor some people, and make others look foolish.5. Not admitting mistakes and claiming ideas.

Did you just have that brilliant idea during that meeting? There’s a good chance he will present it the next day as his own inspiration. The good things come from him, and he/she never makes mistakes. He will at least not admit them and will twist everything so that the blame does not fall on him.
6. And polishing that ego.

Talking about his successes, preferably taking that Rolex off his wrist and waving it around his index finger, and maybe also accidentally leaving his banking app open on his desk. His ego just fits in the room, but is sometimes so big that you have to open a window.
Does your manager have an inflated ego, manipulate a lot, or steal your idea? Do the is-my-boss-a-narcissist-check and you will know.