Warning: this vacation does not match your zodiac sign at all
Are you determined to book a last-minute vacation? last-minute vacation book? Be careful what you wish for. A vacation can sound perfect on paper,, but that doesn't mean it suits you. While one person is happy sleeping in a tent and showering with coins, another is already wondering after three minutes if it's possible to be flown home urgently. But yes. How do you know which vacation really doesn't suit you? You don't have to experience a bunch of horror vacations first; you can just look at your zodiac sign. That thing doesn't say everything, but it might explain why you prefer wandering around a museum for eight hours rather than climbing a mountain with a twelve-kilo backpack. Write it down: this is the vacation for which you'd better take out cancellation insurance.
Taurus: backpacking with just one backpack
Only take one pair of shoes? No hairdryer? Rolling up your clothes so that just a T-shirt fits in your little backpack? Absolutely not. For a Taurus, comfort is the most important goal. Think of good food and a hotel bed where you can disappear horizontally after a long day of vacation. You don't want to haul all your belongings on your back every morning only to sit for three hours on a bus whose air conditioning hasn't worked since 2009. Backpackers call it freedom... You, as a luxury lover, call it living out of a bag, while you could have also taken a suitcase with wheels.
Aries: a cultural vacation with an overloaded schedule
Visiting one church is fine. Maybe even two. But when the tour guide announces after lunch that you will visit four churches, an archaeological museum, and the birthplace of a local poet today, you're already done. As an Aries, you want action, speed, and to be surprised time and again. Walking silently behind a guide with a flag is not your thing. A good city trip where you go out in the hottest club one night and are back at brunch the next day is more your style.
Gemini: a remote nature vacation without wifi
I understand that that little house on that one mountain in Sweden looks very nice, but I'm going to warn you now: you better not do that. It sounds fantastic to be in the middle of nature and enjoy the silence, but the reality is different: that's not for you. As a Gemini, you are lively, social, and very curious. You need variety and new stimuli. Not just walking and listening to birds. Of course not, duh. I can already guarantee you that by the second day, you've been to the supermarket three times just to experience something. After all that peace, you won't be zen, but rather irritated. Prefer a vacation to a bustling city with a busy schedule. The hustle and bustle stimulates you just enough that you don't develop tendencies of mistreatment towards your partner due to boredom.
Cancer: backpacking and sleeping in a different hostel every night
Backpacking is very adventurous. You go to places you could never reach if you went to a hotel. One moment you're in the jungle where the indigenous people once hunted fish with spears, the next moment you're taking a refreshing dip in a beautiful waterfall that you see on every Instagram page. During a backpacking vacation, by staying in hostels, you can go wherever you want, but in practice, it means you have to leave your temporary home every few days, your underwear stuffed in a backpack and rediscover what strange noises your new roommates make. For a Sagittarius, all that discovery is the ideal vacation, but for you as a Cancer, this is not such a good idea. You prefer to visit a museum due to your love for culture and then flop down in a nice hotel. Trust me.
Leo: a primitive hut trek
Well, the name says it all. As a Leo, you also want to be treated like a king. Walking around in the same hiking pants for days and sleeping in a cold mountain hut is not for you. This is not a vacation, but animal abuse. You're willing to climb a mountain, as long as there's an exclusive, luxury hotel at the top that could just as well be in The White Lotus where the staff compliments your good style and keeps refilling your champagne. During a hut trek, your audience consists mainly of mountain goats and hikers who are out of breath. After four hours of climbing, your hair is a mess and your hiking shoes smell like something has died in them. Is that really what you're waiting for? Exactly. Just choose room service.
Virgo: a spontaneous road trip without reservations
Does ‘We just get in and see where we end up’ sound like hell to you? Then a spontaneous road trip won't work for you. The idea of taking a train to Vienna and then seeing where the next train takes you may sound adventurous, but you better skip that. You are an analytical perfectionist, not a ‘go with the flow’ Phil Dunphy. Because where are you going to sleep? What route will you take? What sights do you want to see? And which restaurants will you eat at? Reserving in advance is pointless. Maybe that cute little restaurant is closed on the one day you're in Salzburg. You can't stand not knowing what the weather will be like and what to expect. Reject that ‘we'll see’ road trip. Only go along if you can already make the plan on the train.
Libra: a survival vacation
Making fire for a week, sleeping under a tarp, and washing in a river may sound like paradise to some people. experienced Expedition Robinson Playing is great for Patrick, who spent three years in scouting, but for a Libra, this sounds more like hell. Where he happily dives into the lake, you quickly wonder why someone would voluntarily go on vacation without a normal bathroom. You love beauty and comfort, not mud on your face and a pan of homemade beans. And do you know what else a survival vacation consists of? Making choices. Do you hide from the rain or walk through it? Do you want to lie in your tent before dark or choose to watch the sunset from that beautiful cliff? Various dilemmas will come your way, and that's exactly something you're not good at. You weigh all the pros and cons before deciding whether it's better to go left or right. By the time you finally make a decision, the rest has already moved on. Because you love everything that is aesthetic, a trip to a Pinterest location like London or Paris suits you better.
Scorpio: an all-inclusive vacation with an animation team
Normally, you love discovering the most unique destinations, but this summer you want some rest. Just when you think you can relax at an all-inclusive resort with a pool, that annoying animation team starts breathing down your neck. You just want to lie in silence, but they try to drag you into the pool for aqua gym every hour. An hour later, they come back for the daily game of water polo, and when you finally think you've gotten rid of them, the kids‘ animation team comes rushing in. A Scorpio wants to decide for themselves when to be social and with whom. That overly enthusiastic animator is definitely not on your vacation bingo. Skip this ’relaxation vacation' for now. Instead, choose a spa weekend in Sweden, on the edge of a large forest, where you can discover something new every day. That suits you much better.
Sagittarius: staying at the same resort for a week
Like a Scorpio, you better not set your sights on a resort in Turkey. Lying on the beach for one day you can survive. But a whole week? You won't survive that. By day three, you're desperately looking for a car to rent so you can get away from this godforsaken hotel. I really understand that you want to try something different than the usual trip full of breathtaking locations and impressive historical stories, but this? No. This doesn't suit you. Eating the same breakfast buffet for seven days, lying by the same pool, and seeing the same evening show will drive you to a breakdown. Seriously. You'd be better off not traveling than choosing this because there's nothing else left.
Capricorn: a party vacation
When you were just eighteen, you were all for a drinking vacation. Going to bed at five in the morning, sleeping until the afternoon, and then immediately getting back to cocktails: that was the daily routine. Nowadays, you've outgrown those getaways. You can certainly relax, but not in the club. Lying all day in a dark hotel room feels like a waste of time to you. When your friends finally wake up, you've already visited three museums as a disciplined Capricorn out of your love for history. So don't let yourself be convinced and trapped: avoid that party vacation at all costs.
Aquarius: a fully organized group trip
As an Aquarius, this sounds really terrible to me. Gathering in the lobby every morning at eight and racing around the country with the same people. A busy program is certainly fun, but not being able to follow my own plan? I can't handle that. I want to decide when I need to pee, which building I want to see, and when I'm going to have lunch. Imagine ending up in such a group with all retired couples. That's no fun at all, right? Give me a vacation with ancient workshops, delicious local food, and restaurants where fifty people aren't standing in line. We are quirky water creatures. Sticking to a strict plan is just not in our system.
Pisces: an overcrowded city trip
Do you get the jitters after one museum? Then skip a busy city trip. You're already happy if you can swim a bit and then see which restaurant you'll eat at in the evening. Going on vacation with a friend who wants to see three museums, four monuments, and two shopping streets in four hours is a no-go. You want to wander and daydream. Sitting on a terrace and staying there for three hours because the atmosphere is so chill. Overplanning is really not your thing, believe us. After two days, you're overstimulated by all the tourists, sirens, and someone trying to record a TikTok for the eighteenth time in the middle of the street. As a romantic, you want to take the time to have your Eat Pray Love-moment. So don't go for this option, but for a long trip where anything is possible.
