So you fly glamorous with children

I find flying a celebration. From being temporarily offline, watching movies to the crappy food and a nice chat with the flight attendants. Flying with children is, how do you say it nicely, a challenge.

I prefer to have peace, a plastic cup with bad wine and I hope to be the ideal co-passenger. One that you don't have to deal with. But with children, that doesn't work. It starts with my oldest. She doesn't understand that sometimes you have to keep the seatbelt on and sometimes you don't. When I say: just keep it on the whole flight, she thinks: I'm not doing that at all. Anyway. I have flown a lot with them and I have been around the block a few times so I feel like an expert to give you some advice in this area.

1. Dress them nice and easy

You're thinking about her appearance again, I hear you. But really. A crying child in a nice outfit with sweet braids is always much less annoying than a screamer with a runny nose and a dirty pants.

Leave all clothing items with straps, buckles, zippers, and complicated buttons at home. It should be comfortable and especially easy to take off because those toilets are of course tiny, you want to get out as quickly as possible.

2. Tempt them with candy

I actually never give chemical candy at home, but on the plane I make a big exception for that. I specifically go to Jamin (or actually my super nanny does that) and scoop three bags of all sorts of tempting treats. When the seatbelt is fastened, being quiet and well-behaved, a piece of candy is handed out. And it helps a lot against ear pain.

3. Full tablets

I make sure to have a full iPad with lots of nice apps (Dikkie Dik is a hit, just like the Zwijssen app that teaches them to read), a personal DVD player, and of course my phone which has many photos and the same apps. This way everyone is sweet and content. In case of emergency, I always have my laptop with Frozen, Madagascar, Rapunzel, and other collected works from the Disney company.

4. Wine

For you. For some necessary relaxation. Really, you need it.

5. Small paper money

As a lubricant for the flight attendants. They have often turned a blind eye when my daughter wanted to sit on my lap during takeoff. And we don't always leave the seats perfectly behind. So sweeten the deal. With money, yes.

Tip

I once got a tip in a French pharmacy that pills against motion sickness also make your child nicely sleepy. Seemed like a great plan. But the pill is so disgusting that my daughter even discovered it hidden in a cupcake, from that moment on she distrusted me for two weeks whenever I came with something edible and fell asleep exactly when it wasn't convenient. At the baggage claim for example. Don't do it. Flying is a party. Also for them.